In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities.Others believe the money should be spend on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Construction
Correct article usage
The construction
show examples
of new railway lines shows that the country is developing both
economic
Change the word
economically
show examples
and
as well as
technological
Change the word
technologically
show examples
.The
construction
of
of
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
new shows the improvement in the work of citizens.
This
can connect to very far
places
easily and
also
in
comfortable
Change the article
a comfortable
show examples
way.Improvement in public
transport
also
enhances
Verb problem
encourages
show examples
all
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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to use appropriate
transport
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
based on their
socio- economic
Correct your spelling
socio-economic
show examples
status. the
railways
Fix the agreement mistake
railway
show examples
lines are to be more
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
for all
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
in their
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
activitieswhich
Correct your spelling
activities
include
Wrong verb form
including
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both short and
long distance
Add a hyphen
long-distance
show examples
traveling.
By creating
Change preposition
Creating
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new
railways
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
places
where there is no railway
system
or
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
places
where lack
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
transportation can improve the
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
of
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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.
For instance
, the children
aho
Correct your spelling
who
belongs
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belong
show examples
tolow
Correct your spelling
to low
socio - economic
Correct your spelling
socio-economic
show examples
status where there is less
transportationif
Correct your spelling
transportation if
transportation
any new
railways
are built,
their
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
might
behelpful
Correct your spelling
be helpful
for the students to study,
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
they have to travel long
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to reach their destination quickly.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
the present
scenario
Add a comma
scenario,
show examples
the
transport
system
must be modified by renewasionof new things.The large sum of money can be used in
remodeling
Change the spelling
remodelling
show examples
the
transport
system
.
This
also
can reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pollution and traffic in all
places
.
For instance
,the
glasses
Fix the agreement mistake
glass
show examples
of the bus and doors
canbe
Correct your spelling
can be
altered by using
this
money and can provide
danger free
Add a hyphen
danger-free
show examples
environment to the public.
By
Change preposition
In
show examples
concluding the points , I
felt
Wrong verb form
feel
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the
remodeling
Change the spelling
remodelling
show examples
of
present
Add an article
the present
show examples
system
is
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
enough
Change preposition
for then
show examples
then
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
new
construction
of
railways
and to save money which is allocated for
construction
.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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Introduction
Introduction may benefit from a clear thesis statement reflecting the discussion points and providing a clear stance for a more robust foundation.
Body Paragraphs
While some main points are made, it's imperative to expand upon these with relevant examples and a more comprehensive explanation.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your ideas are logically sequenced and paragraphs are well-connected with cohesive devices to enhance the readability of the text.
Conclusion
The conclusion should reiterate your main points with clarity, reinforcing your stance on the topic. Ensure to directly address the essay question here too.
Grammar
Incorporate more mature and complex sentence structures for a higher level of clarity and engagement throughout the essay.
Grammar and Spelling
Address grammatical errors and typos to improve overall readability. Proofreading can assist in correcting these errors.
Examples
Expand on the examples provided by illustrating how they support your argument. Be sure to connect them back to the prompt more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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