There are several factors that motivate people to stay in the workforce, and money is the most important reason/factor. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
many
people
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
money
is a major key to consider a job
to be worthy. While
it is true that money
is important , other main reasons must be considered along with
it. Nontheless
Correct your spelling
Nonetheless
this
essay displays that money
alone can not be the only main factor
.
On one hand , it is widely accepted by majority
of Add an article
the majority
a majority
people
that with money
not all but most of
Change preposition
apply
things
can be Add an article
the things
accessable
. Correct your spelling
accessible
Due to
the offers that market
tries to Correct article usage
the market
decieve
us with , it is impossible to live without Correct your spelling
deceive
money
. For example
, the costs of accommodation and studying this days
have highly increased. Change the determiner
this day
these days
Furthermore
, the need of being
observed is another fact nowadays , Change preposition
to be
therefore
most of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
care about there
performance in public which Replace the word
their
requiers
good clothing that costs Correct your spelling
requires
alot
. Correct your spelling
a lot
According to
many articles, not only money
is an important factor
, but it is also
needed to get a job
in the first place since
Change preposition
apply
because
most of the Correct word choice
apply
time
, a university degree is needed to apply for a job
filed
and Correct your spelling
field
costs
of Correct article usage
the costs
leaning
are not cheap.
Correct your spelling
learning
On the other hand
, a job
is something that people
doing it must get a
satisfaction from and Remove the article
apply
its
not possible only Correct your spelling
it is
by
Change preposition
with
money
. For instance
, most of
humans have a need Change preposition
apply
for being
respected in public which is something that wealth has little to do withChange preposition
to be
it
. Another Correct pronoun usage
apply
factor
would be the working time
and free time
for the workers. Based on a report made by Washington
Correct article usage
the Washington
post
, over 80 percent Capitalize word
Post
Men
and Women who were happy with their Change preposition
of Men
job
, had a boundary between their workplace and free Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
time
at their house.
In conclusion , it can be said that eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
money
plays an important role on
Change preposition
in
a
Correct article usage
apply
job
value , it is not the main factor
and other reasons must be considered along with
it.Submitted by mhosseinnaseri14 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the paragraph's sentences support that idea directly.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of the essay by improving transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Try to avoid general statements and focus on providing more detailed, specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases and aim for a variety of complex sentence structures to articulate your ideas more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Double-check your spelling and grammar as errors can affect the clarity of your argument.
task achievement
Develop your conclusion further by summarizing your key points and reiterating your position in a nuanced way.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?