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Band 6.5

the chart below gives data about proportion of people who used the internet from 1998 to 2000

the chart below gives data about proportion of people who used the internet from 1998 to 2000
#data #proportion #people #internet
The
chart
 shows figures about the percentage of individuals that used the
internet
 from
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 1998 to 2000.
Overall
, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
Correct article usage
a slightly
show examples
slightly
Change the word
slight
show examples
 decrease
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 usage of
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 during the examined period in the
chart
 for the
age
 group of 16-30
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 and 31-50
years
.
On the other hand
, the utilization of
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 for the
age
 groups under 15
years
 and more than 50, the
chart
 showed
Correct article usage
a gradually
show examples
gradually
Change the word
gradual
show examples
 increase
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their usage of
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 between
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 1998-2000. The
chart
 shows that during the
years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1998 until 2000,
people
 utilized of
internet
 for
age
Add an article
the age
show examples
 group of 16-30
years
 and 31-50
years
 had slightly decreased from 1998 until 1999 from 52% to 45% and from 40% to 38% respectively.
While
 the figures remained stable from year 1998 to 2000 Meanwhile, the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
people
used
Correct pronoun usage
who used
show examples
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 for
people
 less than 15 and more than 50 for the 3
years
shows
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
 on the
chart
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
slightly increased from 3% to 8%
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 individuals less than 15. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
inclining
Correct article usage
an inclining
show examples
 rate for
people
 more than 50
years
 from 8% to 10% during the period 1998 to 2000. In brief, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
upward
Add an article
the upward
an upward
show examples
 trend for
people
 less than 15 and more than 50 in the usage of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
; meanwhile, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
downward
Add an article
the downward
a downward
show examples
 trend for both the
age
 groups 16-30 and 31-50
years
.
Submitted by Mido  on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, internet, years, age, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
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