Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world people share the same advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of these fashions?

#differences #countries #year #world #people #brands #habits #tv #channels #fashions

Nowadays, the countries keep the same ads, brands, and TV shows and share the same style of food, deleting big barriers between countries.

This

essay agrees with the idea that the benefits outweigh the negative aspects, especially in

fashion

since there is one general inclusion

overall

in the world. Keeping the same

fashion

trends, lets different communities travel easily, protecting them from discrimination, as they use the same

fashion

taste. Eating and wearing clothes similar to other ones won't stand out over the rest of the population, and the opportunities will be similar for everyone.

For example

, New York City has a big percentage of diversity, and there is a big connection with the capitalist system, where one person identifies with the city, gets used to buying similar brands and starts enjoying the same TV show, and the style change according with the advertising

that is

around. Imagine that one Indian girl refuses to change the clothes of her culture in a big city like The Big Apple, probably the opportunities will reduce in comparison with other ones.

However

, the big disadvantage in the scenery of keeping the same kind of style is the loss of ethnicity, which is different in each country, and those traditions have moral value for them.

Also

, a lot of them, have restrictions on some kinds of food as meat, because is disrespectful to the religion.

for instance

, Judios do not pork, Indians do eat meat, and Chinese do not eat beef. In conclusion, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

Change preposition

show examples

global

fashion

in the world, since it is changing

according to

TV influence. It makes life easier for the

traveler

Change the spelling

traveller

show examples

, not standing out for a particular religion or culture.

Nonetheless

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people from other

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

can still

using

Change the verb form

use

be using

show examples

their own traditions in their

owns

Replace the word

own

show examples

countries.

Submitted by jennitobon16 on Mon Feb 05 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that this idea is developed coherently throughout the paragraph. Try to use a variety of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay.

task achievement

In the introduction, clearly state if the advantages outweigh the disadvantages or not. This sets the direction for the reader and gives clarity to the essay's argument.

task achievement

Support your main points with specific examples and explanations. Examples help to illustrate and strengthen your arguments. Avoid using hypothetical or generic examples.

task achievement

Be careful of generalizations and consider counter-arguments to create a more balanced essay. Acknowledging both sides demonstrates an understanding of the complexity of the issue.

coherence cohesion

Try to avoid repetitive sentence structures to showcase a range of grammatical constructs and enhance the readability of your essay.

task achievement

Work on refining your conclusion by summarizing the main points of the essay and reiterating your position on the advantages and disadvantages.

coherence cohesion

When discussing different perspectives or ideas, ensure there is a clear distinction between them and explain how they are relevant to the main topic of the essay.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

300 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world people share the same advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of these fashions?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

The rise so social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages?

These days, world leaders of all kinds are younger than those in the past. What are the reasons? Is this a negative or positive trend?

people who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life what are the most significant of these problems? How can these problems be tacked?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Some people today believe that the world's increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis.Other people believe that world population is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of world's economy and society. Discuss both views and give your option.