IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by the UK residents in 1999. Summarize the information and make comparison. Write at least 150 words.

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by the UK residents in 1999. Summarize the information and make comparison. Write at least 150 words.
#line #visits #uk #bar #countries #residents #information #comparison
The
graph
 shows the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
visitors
 to and from
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
,
while
 the bar chart explains the 5 most likely countries that
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 been visited by
UK
residents
.
Overall
, the visits
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
 by
UK
residents
 to other countries increased during the five years in the line
graph
. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, the most popular destination for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
UK
visitors
 was France in the
year
 of 1999. The figures in the line
graph
 explained the number of
visitors
 to
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 had increased sharply from 12
million
 to 52
million
 from the
year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1979 to 1999. Meanwhile, the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 travelling
UK
residents
 to other countries increased gradually during the examined period. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, the bar
graph
 showed the most popular
destinations
Fix the agreement mistake
destination
show examples
 visited by
UK
residents
 during the
year
 1999 was France, as the number of
visitors
 reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
11
million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
UK
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
.
while
 the least visited country was Turkey which visited
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2.5
million
 in the
year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1999.
To sum up
, there was
upward
Add an article
an upward
show examples
 trend of
visitors
 to and from
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in the line
graph
. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 the bar
graph
 indicates that the most popular destination for
UK
residents
 was France in
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1999.
Submitted by Mido  on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words graph, visitors, uk, residents, year, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "explains" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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