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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In spite of advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
It is claimed that nowadays despite all the achievements of humanity in producing food, there exist
countries
 where
people
 are suffering from
hunger
. There are many reasons for
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
, and it is not really easy to solve. From my point of view,
this
 problem is connected to other global problems,
such
 as The North - The South,
demographic
Replace the word
demographics
show examples
, ecological problems and many others. In terms of
people
’s
hunger
, I believe, it is affected by certain factors,
such
 as overpopulation in these
countries
, more frequently they are South, where
people
 are starving,
also
 the lack of technologies,
productions
Fix the agreement mistake
production
show examples
 and high salaries, as they develop extremely slowly in comparison with North
countries
.
Therefore
, it becomes obvious that all these advances in science and technology are not shared with developing
countries
, which makes it more difficult. Speaking of the possible solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
 problem, I guess, the governments of these
countries
 should create
productions
Fix the agreement mistake
production
show examples
 in order to attract investment and become a participant in the global market,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 allows them to adopt technologies and other new world achievements.
Moreover
, it is important to force
people
 to get
education
Add an article
an education
show examples
, as it is necessary to create goods in plants and factories.
Hence
, all these actions could help the country to escape poverty and stop
hunger
. In conclusion, I would like to say that life is not fair, and not all
people
 want to share their advances, as rich
countries
 do not want poor ones to become stronger, so
people
 suffer in poverty and
hunger
.
However
, there exists a decision which can change
this
 terrible situation.
Submitted by ddoiron on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Ensure you have a clear introductory paragraph that presents the topic and your thesis statement. Additionally, have a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your thesis in a conclusive manner.
Support & Examples
Develop your ideas further with clear and specific examples. Your arguments should be supported by relevant details that illustrate the points you are making.
Logical Structure
Work on the logical structure of your essay by organizing your ideas in clear, well-organized paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and follow logically from one to the next.
Task Completion
Make sure you fully address all parts of the task by discussing both reasons for hunger in spite of agricultural advances and proposing clear solutions to address the problem.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
What to do next:
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