because of the global economy, many goods including what we use as daily basics produced by other countires have to be trasported for a long distance. To what extent do the advatages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays,
due to
globalization most of the crucial products which people use during their daily
life-style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
commute and produced far from their own
countries
.
According to
this
significant phenomenon, in my
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
its positive effects are more than its negative ones. On the one hand, globalization has positive impacts on several areas.
Firstly
, developed
countries
send liquidity
invest
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investments
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in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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developing
countries
which creates more job opportunities in these regions.
secondly
, increasing
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
international relationship
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
universal peace and welfare
as a result
most of the
war
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wars
show examples
such
as
Afganestan
Correct article usage
the Afganestan
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and Iraq
war
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wars
show examples
will
be remove
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be removed
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
universal
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the universal
show examples
economy has negative impacts on various regions too.
First,
this
phenomenon will destroy small and local businesses which
due to
this
situation increasing joblessness will be a clear element in rural areas.
Second,
cultural homogenization will arise during
mixture
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a mixture
the mixture
show examples
of these trades which could
effect
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affect
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on history,
belief
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beliefs
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,
value
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values
show examples
and customs of each country.
To conclude
, during of global economy most of the daily goods are transported between various
countries
which has its own pros and cons. In my view globalization is a phenomenon that will not stop,
however
,
this
action could
be control
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be controlled
show examples
in a
balance
Change the verb form
balanced
show examples
way to
decresing
Correct your spelling
decrease
its negative impacts on
countries
and their cultures.
Submitted by amineh.rezapour67 on

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task response
Ensure a clear position throughout the essay, which addresses the task prompt directly. Clarify how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in a more structured approach.
task response
Develop paragraphs with clear main ideas, followed by explanations and examples. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure that your essay transitions smoothly from one idea to the next with appropriate linking words.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to assist with the flow and clarity of your argument.
task response
Provide specific examples to illustrate your points. These examples should be detailed and directly linked to your main points.
coherence cohesion
Proofread your essay to avoid grammatical errors and to ensure the correct use of punctuation and capitalization. This will aid in the clear communication of your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global economy
  • international trade
  • comparative advantage
  • carbon footprint
  • economic dependency
  • cultural homogenization
  • sustainable practices
  • transportation emissions
  • accessibility
  • local industries
  • trade fairness
  • economic growth
  • long-distance transport
  • consumer choice
  • cultural diversity
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