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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the amount of money spent on book in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005.

The graph shows the amount of money spent on book in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005.
#amount #money #book #germany #france #austria
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The provided line graph delineates how people in four
Europian
Correct your spelling
European
show examples
 countries spent their money on
books
 in the interval between 1995 and 2005.
Overall
, it is readily apparent that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 Germans have bought
books
 more than others throughout the whole years,
in contrast
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overall
Correct article usage
the Austrian's
show examples
Austrian's
Change noun form
Austrian
show examples
 crowd
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 not willing to
buying
Change the verb
buy
show examples
books
 as much as others,
also
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
for three years 2003,2004 and 2005 their
books
Fix the agreement mistake
book
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 shops were crowd more than Italy's.
First,
at the start point of the
measurement
Add a comma
measurement,
show examples
 the
numers
Correct your spelling
numbers
 80, 55, and 50
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
millions
Add the preposition
millions of
show examples
 American
dolloars
Correct your spelling
dollars
 show money spent on
book-shopping
Correct your spelling
book shopping
show examples
 in Germany
France
 and Italy
repectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
. the rank of each country does not
changed
Change the verb form
change
show examples
 with an expectation of Italy, Germany was the most active in reading
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
next,
France
 ranked two.
to
Capitalize word
To
show examples
 be more precise:about 95
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 for Germany, 74 for
France
 and just over 60 for Italy. Some alternation
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 taken place during those years,the
grow
Replace the word
growth
show examples
 in Austria was sharp and it
overtake
Change the verb form
overtakes
show examples
 Italy in2003 in spite of
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 experience of
level
Add an article
the level
show examples
 of from 1999 to 2001.
Moreover
,
climbing
Correct article usage
the climbing
show examples
 of Italian people in book-shopping was changed to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 and because of that was not
success
Correct article usage
a success
show examples
 to
becomig
Correct your spelling
becoming
become
replace
Wrong verb form
replacing
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
France
while
 they were
approximalty equall
Correct your spelling
approximately equal
 in 1997.
Submitted by amirhossein7179 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words books, france with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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