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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects Other people think that in todays world subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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History
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,
science
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 and
technology
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 an essential
school
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 subjects that must be taught to
school
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children
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.
However
Linking Words
, there are debatable discussions on what
school
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 subjects are more important
due to
Linking Words
 the
world
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's technological development nowadays, whether it is
history
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 or
science
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 and
technology
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. On the one hand, by learning
history
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children
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 can know and appreciate their nation's story in the past.
This
Linking Words
 is highly important in terms of making youth get deeper insight and knowledge of their nation's historical moments and how the country has been built.
For instance
Linking Words
, by learning local
history
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,
children
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 know the story of how their nation has struggled to fight against the invaders to achieve national independence.
As a result
Linking Words
,
children
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 know their identities and love their country more and more.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, learning
world
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 subjects like
science
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 and
technology
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 is
also
Linking Words
 important
due to
Linking Words
 the
world
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's technological development nowadays. Knowledge about
science
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 and
technology
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 prepares
children
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 for tight global competition among other countries across the
world
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. In
this
Linking Words
 modern era, it is obviously confirmed that the advancement of a country is determined by mastery of
science
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 and
technology
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. As an example, Japan is globally known that they are one step forward among other countries , particularly in the automotive industry and
technology
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 regarding their local products like Toyota and Honda. To summarize, whether
History
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 or
science
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 and
technology
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, both are
similarly
Linking Words
 important and have a positive effect on
school
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children
Use synonyms
 in order to get comprehensive pieces of knowledge.

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task achievement
To improve your task response, ensure you are presenting a balanced argument for both views before concluding with your own opinion. Also, be careful with expressing a decisive viewpoint when the task requires a discussion of both sides.
coherence cohesion
Increase the use of linking words to improve the flow of your essay and make it more cohesive. Consistency in argument development will also aid in achieving a higher grade in coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
To enhance logical structure, organize your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences that reflect the main ideas you are discussing. This will help in making the arguments more structured and easier to follow.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. While you have discussed examples such as Japan's automotive industry, further elaboration and varied examples would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but make sure your conclusion clearly reflects the points made in the essay and reiterates your personal stance on the topic to reinforce your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural heritage
  • moral values
  • critical thinking
  • analytical skills
  • innovation
  • economic growth
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • healthcare
  • problem-solving
  • practical skills
  • job market
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