You have just started a course in a college which has no sports facilities of its own.

#course #college #sports #facilities

Dear Sir or Madam, I am

Change the article

show examples

ordinary

college

student.The

college

I have been attending for

few

Correct article usage

a few

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days in order to attend

course

Add an article

the course

a course

show examples

unfortunately

Add the comma(s)

unfortunately,

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doesnot

Correct your spelling

does not

doesn't

own any kind of

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

clubs which makes me so disappointed. I have been going to the

sport

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sports

show examples

clubs for almost two years.

Thus

I would love to go to your private

sport

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sports

show examples

centre

while

I am studying in

this

college

course.

Due to

several

reasons

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reasons,

show examples

I have chosen your private

sport

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sports

show examples

centre

Firstly

, I have heard

bunch

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a bunch

show examples

of positive

feedbacks

Fix the agreement mistake

feedback

show examples

about your

centre

Secondly

,It is located near the

college

which makes it so

convinient

Correct your spelling

convenient

for me. I would be so pleased if you could send me information about

costs

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the costs

show examples

and

opening

Correct article usage

the opening

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and closing

time

Fix the agreement mistake

times

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of the

centre

as soon as possible.

Also

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Also,

show examples

Change the capitalization

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would be grateful if you could give me a discount for a year

due to

my personal problems . Youth faithfully, Jasmina

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Thu Feb 08 2024

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task achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure you expand on your main points with clear, comprehensive ideas. Additionally, provide more relevant, specific examples that directly relate to how the lack of sports facilities affects you or suggest solutions.

coherence cohesion

Work on developing a logical structure in your writing. This means organizing your ideas clearly with a distinct introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a central idea and subsequent sentences should elaborate on this.

task achievement

Your letter should include all key information required by the task, such as why the college's lack of sports facilities matters to you, specific requests from the sports center, and clear reasons for your requests. Make sure each part of the letter serves a clear purpose.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

146 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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You have just started a course in a college which has no sports facilities of its own.

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

Some people prefer to go to health clubs and gyms for health care, some say the walking and climbing stairs are more effective. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.

Some people think that schools should reward students with best academic results, while others believe that it is more important to reward students who show improvements. Discuss both views and give your opinion

A big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, more teenagers want to become actors or singers. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or negative development?