You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. "You have seen an advertisement from a couple, who live in Australia, for someone to teach their two children your language for a year." Write a letter to the couple. In your letter, • explain why you think you would be suitable for the job • say what else you could do for the family • give your reasons for wanting the job Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing
this
letter regarding the advertisment
posted for someone to teach your two children our Correct your spelling
advertisement
language
for a year. I believe that,
I am a good fit for Remove the comma
apply
this
position.
Let me assure you about my background in this
field. I have been working as a full-time native language
, Hindi, instructor in
Smith Elementary School for more than 5 years. My teaching includes all four modules, listening, speaking, writing and reading. I have been awarded as the best Change preposition
at
language
instructor by central
Correct article usage
the central
goverenment
of Australia. As per the Correct your spelling
government
advertisment
, you are Correct your spelling
advertisement
also
looking for someone that not only teach
the Correct subject-verb agreement
teaches
language
but also
some basic rituals so, I think I am a good fit for this
position because I am a full-time instructor along with
a mother of two kids. In my house, nobody is allowed to speak English neither my two children.
Despite of
teaching, I can Change preposition
apply
takecare
of your kids, indulge them in some outdoor Correct your spelling
take care
activites
, can teach them yoga and make them understand Correct your spelling
activities
about
our culture. I am available to workChange preposition
apply
9
to 5pm on weekdays and from 10 to 4pm on weekends if required. Change preposition
from 9
Furthermore
, your children are welcome to my cooking and abacus classes.
Due to
some personal issues
I can no longer work at School but, I did not even want to end my teaching career. Add a comma
issues,
Moreover
, I am a single mom so, I have to look through the expenses by
my own. I hope you will consider me a good fit for Change preposition
on
this
posting. Please let me know if you have any concerns and feel free to contact my
through email or phone.
Your's Correct pronoun usage
me
faithfully
,
CindyReplace the adverb
faithful
Submitted by harneet2001kaur on
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Task Achievement
Be sure to directly address the tasks mentioned in the prompt. Although your letter covers the required points, it could benefit from more clear and detailed examples to explain why you are suitable for the job. For instance, describe the specific teaching methods or successes you've had with teaching children.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph is organized around a single clear idea, presenting your suitability for the job, what else you could do for the family, and your reasons for wanting the job. Your letter does this well, but further refinement and clear separation of these ideas would help.
Coherence & Cohesion
Connect your ideas more smoothly by using a range of cohesive devices (e.g., conjunctions, pronouns, synonyms) beyond basic connectors. This will help your letter flow better and enhance the reader's understanding.
Task Achievement
Maintain a formal and polite tone throughout the letter to match the writing task. Words like 'takecare' should be written as two words ('take care'), and casual language ('Due to some personal issues') can be replaced with a more formal expression ('Due to personal circumstances'). Also, each paragraph should open with a clear topic sentence.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite