IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You have just started a course on a college which has nosport facilities of otd own. Write a letter to the manager of the nearest private sports club . In your letter •introduce yourself •say why you are intersted in this sports club •ask some questions about club e.g. facilities , members , cost

#course #college #nosport #facilities #otd #manager #sports #club #•introduce #•say #•ask #questions #e #g #members #cost
Dear Sir or Madam I am writing
this
 letter to express my interest in joining your
club
 . My name is Lily and I recently enrolled in
college
Correct article usage
a college
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 which is located near your location . I am
seeking
Verb problem
talking
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about
this
 because my college is not provided with
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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 facilities. First of all , let me introduce myself . My full name is Lily Will Love and I am a student
os
Correct your spelling
of
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 HBS
college
Capitalize word
College
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. I first saw Lena who was coming back from your fitness
club
while
l
 was going to my home . I am interested in your
club
 because your
club
 is
supplied
Replace the word
supplies
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classes
such
 as yoga , cycling and others.
However
Add a comma
However,
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l
 would like to know more information about your
classes
 . So
l
 have several questions . Do you have basketball
classes
? How much does it cost for a month? Another question is where
l
 can check the timetable of basketball
classes
 .
Lastly
 ,
l
 would be grateful if you could give me more information about
classes
 . I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
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 you could inform me as soon as possible but not later in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 week. Yours faithfully Lily Will
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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task achievement
Ensure you introduce yourself at the beginning in a concise manner to set the context for your request.
task achievement
Express clearly and early in the letter why you are writing to the sports club manager.
coherence cohesion
Make a clear and logical order for your inquiries to facilitate understanding and response from the sports club manager.
task achievement
End your letter with an appropriate closing statement that requests a specific outcome or response.
coherence cohesion
Use paragraphing effectively to separate different ideas or topics within your letter.
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