IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think it is better to choose friend who always have the same opinions as them.Other people believe it is good to have who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss bot these views and give your own opinion .

#people #friend #bot
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that some
people
Use synonyms
 think that it is better to choose those
friends
Use synonyms
 who mostly agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them than those
friends
Use synonyms
 who disagree with them sometimes. In my opinion, I believe that having both of
these
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
kind
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 is better because it helps me make up my
thoughts
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is good to have
people
Use synonyms
 who agree with each other because it validates their
thoughts
Use synonyms
 that they are
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the right path. It
also
Linking Words
 helps them to think in that way and having
people
Use synonyms
 who agree with them could lead to more
positives
Change the noun form
positive
show examples
thoughts
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, having these
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 helps them boost their confidence that they can actually talk to
these
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
kind
Use synonyms
 of group.
In contrast
Linking Words
 to that, it is
also
Linking Words
 good to have
people
Use synonyms
 who disagree with each other sometimes. It is because
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
not all of our
thoughts
Use synonyms
 are correct.
People
Use synonyms
 are not perfect and they should be corrected if their
friends
Use synonyms
 think they're not thinking properly or when they are about to make a bad decision.
Lastly
Linking Words
, I believe that having both
people
Use synonyms
 who agree and disagree with you is the best
kind
Use synonyms
 of group to be
friends
Use synonyms
 with.
This
Linking Words
 is the best decision to make when choosing
friends
Use synonyms
 because it
also
Linking Words
 opens the mind
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 better
thoughts
Use synonyms
. Sometimes, a
friend
Use synonyms
 who agrees all the time
turn
Correct subject-verb agreement
turns
show examples
 out to be incorrect and a
friend
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 disagrees all the time
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
also
Linking Words
 incorrect.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I conclude that having a
friend
Use synonyms
 who agrees, validates a person's
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
while
Linking Words
 having a
friend
Use synonyms
 who disagrees with them helps them to think that their opinions are not always right. Meanwhile, having both of
these
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
kind
Use synonyms
 of
friends
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 the best option because it balances the way of thinking.
Submitted by alma_milly on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To enhance your score, first ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the main points you will discuss, without explicitly stating 'In my opinion'. Use a more varied range of cohesive devices to structure your argument and paragraphs more effectively.
task achievement
Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and provide more concrete and relevant examples to support your ideas. This will strengthen your argument and show a deeper understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • like-minded
  • shared beliefs
  • reinforcement
  • conflict avoidance
  • emotional support
  • social activities
  • diverse perspectives
  • personal growth
  • challenging conversations
  • open-mindedness
  • critical thinking
  • negotiate
  • core values
  • healthy debate
  • enriching experiences
  • personal development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: