Some people believe that continue university after finish school is the best way to get a good job, some people prefer to work to get experience. Discuss both views and opinion

Most
of
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apply
show examples
people decide to study at the university because they believe that have
opportunity
Correct article usage
the opportunity
show examples
to
work
at
leading
Add an article
the leading
a leading
show examples
firm,
while
others prefer to opposite way
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
get experience. In my opinion, I prefer to continue in
institute
Add an article
the institute
show examples
and I will examine both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
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with
this
essay. The majority of students decide to study at the institute because,
first,
having
specific
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a specific
show examples
subject
offer
Wrong verb form
offered
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to pupils
such
an
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
engineering, computer science, medical etc., which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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can have value in
career
Add an article
a career
show examples
in the future.
Second,
many
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in many
show examples
industries, a degree is now becoming increasingly popular or essential because some
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
need to certificate, in Thailand you will earn salary more than people without
degree
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a degree
show examples
, In Thailand if
graduated
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graduate
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bachelor
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bachelor's
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degree standard salary start is 15,000 baths, which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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can guarantee money that you will earn in
work
at long run.
However
, if they want to
work
during study, they have to register a volunteer by selecting a company that
relevant
Add a missing verb
is relevant
show examples
subject that
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
learn, which
is encourage
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is encouraged
is encouraging
show examples
on
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apply
show examples
knowledge and experience in their
career
.
Although
, studying
necessarily
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necessary
show examples
, but
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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money a lot because they will pay
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
cost
in
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of
show examples
education during learning
such
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
term fees, transport fees
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
food fees etc. So may
difficult
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be difficult
show examples
for pupils not
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
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sponsor
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a sponsor
show examples
to
support
Correct pronoun usage
support them
show examples
.
On the other hand
, some pupils
inspire
Wrong verb form
are inspired
show examples
to
work
when finishing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
school, they believe that
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
of working is
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
have many years of
work
which is experience that
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
confidents
Correct your spelling
confident
in
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
. But, undeniable leads of students lack of
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
to continue to the university as well so,
they
Rephrase
so they
show examples
have to
work
for
living
Correct article usage
a living
show examples
consumer and I think that if they have money enough, they may
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
learn again. In conclusion, it seems to me that student
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
likely to be successful in their
career
if they continue to university beyond the school level.
Submitted by chompoo34888 on

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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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