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Writing Samples
Band 6

the graph below show the number of university graduates in canada from 1992 to 2007.

the graph below show the number of university graduates in canada from 1992 to 2007.
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The line chart depicts the quality of graduates in Canada From 1992 until 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the graduates from female in the first period and grew up in the
last
Linking Words
 period,
while
Linking Words
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
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 graduated below women even though increased in the
last
Linking Words
 time.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, from 1992 until 1995 females experienced little increase from 100,000 to 105,000 graduations,
however
Linking Words
 from 1996 to 2000 back to the first period at 100,000.
The female's
Correct article usage
Female's
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 graduation continued to increase in 2001 and at the top position in 2006 with
the
Correct article usage
a
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 total graduates
almost
Change preposition
of almost
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 150,000. Meanwhile, the graduation of females in Canada experienced fluctuation, with 70,000 students graduating in
this
Linking Words
 country, which slightly increased in 1995 to 75,000. Drop until 2003, and speedy increase in the
last
Linking Words
 moment at 95,000.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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