Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that
teenagers
can learn fundamental skills by working part-
time
.
While others
Correct word choice
Others
show examples
say that
teenagers
must spend their
time
by taking rest. Though
teenagers
can earn
money
and learn how to be disciplined, in my opinion, they have A0 spend their
time
on leisure activities and school activities for their intellectual and
crective
Correct your spelling
creative
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development
develooment
Correct your spelling
development
On the one hand, people believe that
teenagers
should focus on their after-school
time
for part-
time
work. They can learn to be disciplined by working for someone and meeting the deadlines.
Also
, they can earn additional
money
for their expenses.
For example
, if a student earns some amount of
money
on their own they can learn to manage their own finances and give them confidence to stand on their own lea
On the other hand
, some people think that
time
is better spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
rest and school assignments.
Thev
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They
can regain their
energv
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energy
when they are resting. It
helos
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helps
show examples
them to learn and create better.
Also
. devoting
time
to school activities can improve their intellectual skills.
For example
, when someone is at rest, he or she can write or draw.
This
serves
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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as an opportunity to explore different skills and talents.
To conclude
, even though students can gain
money
by doing work, it could create pressure
among
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on
show examples
them. So, it is better to focus on their studies and improve their knowledge. It can create a better future for them. If a student becomes a part of an organization, he or she will lose educational opportunities.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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