IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Two weeks ago you bought a radio from a local branch of a well-known chain of shops. It did not work properly. The shop took it back and said they would repair it. You have waited a week and it is still not ready. Write a letter to the shop. In your letter say what has happened and how you feel ask them to explain why there has been a delay ask them to repair the radio very quickly or to supply you with a new radio

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Dear Sam, Am
Fency
Correct your spelling
Fancy
 Stanly, I was given a
radio
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 shop for repairing on
last
Linking Words
 week. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to you
inform
Fix the infinitive
to inform
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
you that
show examples
 till now,I
did
Verb problem
have
show examples
 not
get
Verb problem
received
show examples
 any
further
Linking Words
 information about my
radio
Use synonyms
. I bought a new red
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 CARAVAN
radio
Use synonyms
 from your shop
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2 weeks back. Unfortunately, it did not work properly
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 I started to use
from
Correct pronoun usage
it from
show examples
 my home. I took it back
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
here and one of your
employer
Change to a plural noun
employers
show examples
 advised for repair. I gave my
radio
Use synonyms
 to him.
Its
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
 is gone a week.
Still
Add a comma
Still,
show examples
 it is not ready. I
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
 very sad and
anger
Replace the word
angry
show examples
 about that. I need an explanation regarding the reason for
delay
Correct article usage
the delay
show examples
. Are you neglecting my service
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
on purpose or not? I am planning
this
Linking Words
radio
Use synonyms
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
as a gift for my husband's birthday. He loved to enjoy music. So I request you to repair the
radio
Use synonyms
 very quickly or to supply
with
Correct pronoun usage
us with
show examples
 a new CARAVAN
radio
Use synonyms
. Kindly accept my request and do the needful. Faithfully,
Fency
Correct your spelling
Fancy
 Stanly

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structure and greeting
Ensure a clear structure by starting with a proper greeting, followed by an introduction, body paragraphs for each main point, and a clear conclusion or closing statement. For example, you could begin with 'Dear Manager', 'Dear Sir/Madam', or the specific name if known.
logical structure and coherence
To improve coherence, make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea. You could structure it as: 1) Introduction of the problem, 2) Description of the issue and expression of feelings, 3) Request for an explanation and a solution. This keeps the content organized and logically ordered.
use of linking words
Using linking phrases such as 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'Consequently' can improve the flow of your arguments. They help in connecting ideas and paragraphs smoothly, enhancing the reader's understanding.
details and elaboration
Your task response is generally good as you cover the requirements: stating the problem, asking for an explanation, and requesting a solution. To enhance this, add more details about how the situation has affected you, increasing the urgency of your request.
formality and politeness
Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter. Avoid expressions of anger or frustration. Instead, use polite requests and expressions of hope for a quick resolution. Phrases like 'I would appreciate it if...', 'I kindly request...' improve the tone.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • malfunctioning
  • inconvenience
  • promptly
  • compensation
  • customer satisfaction
  • reliable
  • favorable resolution
  • essential
  • retail business
  • well-known chain
  • swift resolution
  • personal use
  • disappointment
  • frustration
  • inquiry
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