Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The poverty
is a critical problem Correct article usage
Poverty
that is
ocurrs
in many Correct your spelling
occurs
develping
Correct your spelling
developing
countries
due to
financial and economic problems and lack
of resources. The funding Correct article usage
a lack
that is
made by developed counties
to Correct your spelling
countries
support
the poor nations does not participate in solving that issue. there are many ways to support
those countries
in an efficient way rather than the
financial Correct article usage
apply
support
. I contend that statement, and in the essay, i
will Change the capitalization
I
demostrate
the reason for that issue.
I believe the key Correct your spelling
demonstrate
of
progression for any country is through educating the individuals and the spread of Change preposition
to
awarness
among people of the importance of that. If all people are well educated that will assist Correct your spelling
awareness
to produce
for Change preposition
in producing
the
society doctors, teachers and many other professionals that the developing Correct article usage
apply
countries
needed acheive
improvements, Correct your spelling
achieve
For instance
, Malaysia is from
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
a
counties
that set Replace the word
country
the
education at the top of its Correct article usage
apply
piriorties
Correct your spelling
priorities
from
50 years ago and set a large amount of capital Change preposition
for
budet
to improve the educational system. Nowadays Correct your spelling
budget
became
Wrong verb form
become
from
the top in schooling ,
Change preposition
apply
Furthermore
, the developed nations could increase the employment opportunities for the developing nation
by investing in those Fix the agreement mistake
nations
countries
. both sides will benefit from implementing these invesment
. Correct your spelling
investment
investments
For example
. many international brands, such
as Nike open their manufacturing factories in African counties
to reduce the label cost.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
countries
the
financial aid Correct article usage
apply
do
not Change the verb form
does
support
the
developing Correct article usage
apply
countries
and it is better to hep
Correct your spelling
help
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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The conclusion appears to be incomplete, affecting the overall structure.
coherence cohesion
Focus on logically organizing your ideas. Use linking words to better connect sentences and paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your argument.
task achievement
Expand on your examples by explaining how they support your arguments. Providing more detail and depth to your examples will strengthen your essay.
task achievement
Address the prompt fully by discussing both why you agree or disagree that financial aid is not effective and what other types of aid could be more beneficial. Your essay seems to focus more on alternatives without fully addressing the ineffectiveness of financial aid.
general
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation to ensure clarity and professionalism in your writing.
general
Develop your conclusion to provide a clear, strong stance on the subject, summarizing your main points. The incomplete conclusion weakens the overall effectiveness of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.