“Because of the busy pace of modern life, many children spend most of their time indoors and have little exposure to the natural world.” Discuss the effects lack of experience with and understanding of nature can have on children as they grow up. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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These days,
effect
Correct article usage
the effect
show examples
of developed technic, lots of children
spends
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spend
show examples
many time with smart phone and in
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the doors
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doors
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door
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without
not to be
Verb problem
being
show examples
exposured
Correct your spelling
exposed
exposure
to the natural
word
Correct your spelling
world
show examples
.
This
situation can
make
Verb problem
cause
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different
kind
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kinds
show examples
of
problem
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problems
show examples
to
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for
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child
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children
show examples
.
First,
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
of
experience
for
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with
show examples
natural
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the natural
show examples
world to the childern can
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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health care. There are needed amount of exercise and
work out
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workout
show examples
for
childern
Correct your spelling
children
in a day. When it doesn't fill,
child
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the child
a child
show examples
can get fat or sick because of various
virus
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viruses
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.
Moreover
, it can
effect
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affect
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to
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apply
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the metal which
disturb
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disturbs
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studying in the
furture
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future
. So young age
have
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has
show examples
to
experience
outside many
time
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times
show examples
to provide
problem
Add an article
the problem
a problem
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of health.
Next,
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the child
a child
show examples
child
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children
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can have
opportunity
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the opportunity
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to learn
many
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about many
show examples
situation
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situations
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and
experience
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experiences
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that help them when they grow up. The time when children grow up, exposed to
natural
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the natural
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world is important because nature has different
kind
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kinds
show examples
of
situation
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situations
show examples
which can give
lesson
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lessons
show examples
. When I was young, I had
a
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an
show examples
experience
that
plents
Correct your spelling
parents
never give up growing despite
of
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apply
show examples
difficult conditions.
This
made me
to
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apply
show examples
try
anytime
Correct your spelling
time
show examples
,
although
there
is
Wrong verb form
was
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a
Change the article
an
show examples
obstacle which
makes
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
me hard to grow up. In ferred to
Correct article usage
the obove
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obove
Correct your spelling
above
text, lack of
exposed
Replace the word
exposure
show examples
to the natural world for children makes dangerous health care and take
learn
Verb problem
apply
show examples
of opportunity.
That is
why we have to make
Correct article usage
an affort
show examples
affort
Correct your spelling
effort
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
to go outside and get
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of
experience
.
Submitted by chwkmkmn on

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supported main points
Support your main points with more detailed explanations and specific examples. This will add depth to your essay and make your arguments more convincing.
complete response
Make sure to directly address the prompt by discussing the effects of a lack of experience with nature on children. Clarify how these effects manifest and provide detailed reasons and examples to support your claims.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on organizing your ideas more effectively. Each paragraph should present a single clear idea, supported by reasons and examples. Use transition words to help the flow of your essay.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate specific examples from your own experiences or other reliable sources to support your arguments. This will make your essay more engaging and persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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