IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

A friend of yours is thinking of going on a camping holiday for the first time this summer. He/She has asked for your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Explain why you think your friend would enjoy a camping holiday Describe some possible disadvantages Say whether you would like to camping with your friend this summer

#friend #holiday #first #time #summer #advice
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Dear Husan, First of all, let's discuss your question about going on
camping
Add an article
a camping
show examples
 holiday -
this
Linking Words
 is an excellent decision on your part.
Firstly
Linking Words
,you will enjoy the view of nature itself, the sun shines very brightly, there are huge camps in the forests,you will relax right in the open air, don't forget to take a tent with you in the evening, it will be cold and warm blankets, all
this
Linking Words
 will help you
Although
Linking Words
 I would advise you to take fishing rods, you will catch fish and fry it under the fire in the evenings and eat it
Secondly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 vocation will give you many vivid impressions of the beauty of nature;
moreover
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, in the evening you will fry marshmallows under the fire.
This
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also
Linking Words
 has its downsides: in the evening there are a lot of mosquitoes and flies, they are very annoying;
moreover
Linking Words
, there are various insects that crawl into your tent and it's scary. I would like to ask you if I could go with you
to
Change preposition
on
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 the camping holiday, I will help you figure out what you don't understand
Correct the word
Yours
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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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 sincerely Arthur
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your letter has a clear and logical structure throughout. This helps the reader to follow your thoughts and advice more easily.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a variety of sentence structures and more sophisticated linking words to improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider using paragraphs more effectively to separate ideas clearly, such as dedicated paragraphs for the advantages, disadvantages, and your availability to join the camping trip.
Task Achievement
Make sure to address all parts of the prompt fully. This includes providing detailed explanations and examples for each section of your letter: why your friend would enjoy camping, possible disadvantages, and clearly stating your wish to join.
Task Achievement
Try to add more personal touches and specific examples based on your own experiences or expectations of camping to make the advice more engaging.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adventure
  • serenity
  • outdoors
  • refreshing
  • hustle and bustle
  • inherent
  • foster
  • distractions
  • cost-effective
  • unpredictable
  • wildlife
  • adequate preparation
  • physical demands
  • researching
  • campsite
  • lasting memories
  • mutual interests
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