You recently went to a concert and thought one of the singers was very good. You want to tell him how you feel. Write a letter ro the singer. In your letter . say how you feel about his performance . give details of your musical activities . explain how you would like him to help you with your musical activities

#concert #singers #ro #singer #performance #activities

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Dear Sir, I am writing

this

letter to exhibit my feelings regarding your live music that was held yesterday at Cambridge

hall

Capitalize word

Hall

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in Delhi and I was there in the concert as a part of the audience. I want to say that your songs were really inspiring and motivating as I am your big fan and I have heard all your songs that always exhilarate my confidence and give me inner peace.

However

, I had a lot of fun when you performed I felt magic in the air

also

the lyrics

was

Change the verb form

were

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super powerful to encourage the crowd.

Moreover

, I could not

stopped

Change the verb form

stop

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myself

to dance

Change preposition

from dancing

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thus

last

night was

the

Change the article

apply

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memorable and enjoyable for me. I am

also

musician

Add an article

a musician

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by profession and I have 10 years of experience in the same field. I play guitar and drums and perform for the local clubs.

In addition

, daily practice makes me perfect

however

, I have requested

you

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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Correct word choice

that

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you

could

Verb problem

apply

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allow me to join your group for two hours

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a day which will help me to learn work ethic and professionalism that will polish my skills and talent. I am looking forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Sam

Submitted by Kaurharvinder2984 on Thu Feb 15 2024

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Tone & Formality

Focus on maintaining a formal tone throughout the letter for consistency. Variations in tone can make the letter feel less professional. For instance, phrases like 'I could not stopped myself to dance' might be too informal for a letter to a professional musician you haven't met personally.

Grammar & Punctuation

Improve grammatical accuracy and punctuation throughout the letter. Errors in sentence construction and punctuation can detract from the clarity and professionalism of your message. Consider revising sentences for better flow and correctness.

Coherence & Cohesion

Enhance cohesion by connecting ideas more smoothly between paragraphs. Currently, each paragraph introduces a new topic abruptly. You could use transition words or phrases to create a more seamless flow from one idea to the next.

Task Achievement

To better address the task, you could expand on how specifically you hope the singer can help you with your musical activities. Are there specific skills, techniques, or types of guidance you're seeking? This detail will make your request more concrete and actionable.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

199 words

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In some countries, most people prefer to rent their homes rather than buying them.what are some of the advantages and disadvantages of renting homes ?

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