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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the amount of waste production (in millions of tonnes) in six differerent countries over a twenty-year period.

The table below shows the amount of waste production (in millions of tonnes) in six differerent countries over a twenty-year period.
#amount #waste #production #millions #tonnes #six #differerent #countries #period
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The table above illustrates the number in millions of
tons
Use synonyms
 of production wasted by 6 different countries over
20-year
Add an article
a 20-year
the 20-year
show examples
 time frame. All in all, it is transparent that the
weight
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 of wasted production in America was the highest in these countries,
while
Linking Words
 the
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
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 in Ireland were the lowest. The
weight
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 of wasted
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
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 witnessed a general incline throughout
20 years
Correct your spelling
the 20-year
 period except
of
Remove the preposition
apply
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in Korea. In 1980,
American
Replace the word
America
show examples
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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generated the highest
weight
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 of scraps, accounting for a whopping 131
million
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tons
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, more than 50 times as large as the number in Portugal.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the waste production in Ireland was the lowest, with the figure standing at only 0.6
million
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tons
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, almost
one seventh
Add a hyphen
one-seventh
show examples
 the data in Poland (4
million
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tons
Use synonyms
). Diverting the data in 2000, there was a significant increase in the data in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
, which reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
192
million
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tons
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 the number in Ireland
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
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 only 4.4
million
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tons
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, the lowest
weight
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 in
this
Linking Words
 year.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the figure in Poland and Portugal stood at around 5 to 7
million
Use synonyms
tons
Use synonyms
 as well.
Submitted by luoyinjian2 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tons, weight, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 2 times.
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