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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph below shows changes in the amount of coffee exported from three countries between 2002 and 2012

The line graph below shows changes in the amount of coffee exported from three countries between 2002 and 2012
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The line chart compares the
coffee
Use synonyms
 export from three nations in South America measured in
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 over 10
years
Correct your spelling
10-year
 period from 2002 to 2012. In summary,
coffee
Use synonyms
 sales in every
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
 in South America have boosted from
starting
Correct article usage
the starting
show examples
 points of the time presented in
chart
Add an article
the chart
a chart
show examples
. Brazil has stable growth
however
Linking Words
, Colombia and Costa Rica have
flutuactive
Correct article usage
a flutuactive
show examples
 trend but
at the
Linking Words
end
Add a comma
end,
show examples
 they have
surge
Correct article usage
a surge
show examples
 the production compared
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the beginning of the time presented in
graph
Add an article
the graph
a graph
show examples
. Looking in more detail, in 2002 Brazil exported approximately 12
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 of
coffee
Use synonyms
 and steadily
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 to 25
million
Use synonyms
kilogram
Change to a plural noun
kilograms
show examples
 in 2012.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, for Costa
Rica
Add a comma
Rica,
show examples
 the
coffee
Use synonyms
 export
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dropped to 7
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 between 2002 and 2006. After that, Costa Rica has progressively
rise
Change the verb form
risen
show examples
 to 20
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 in 2012.
Lastly
Linking Words
, Columbia has
trade
Wrong verb form
traded
show examples
 overseas 12
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 in 2006,
nevertheless
Linking Words
, it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
dropped significantly by around 3
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 in 2008.
Linking Words
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, the trade
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
gradually
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 to 15
million
Use synonyms
kilograms
Use synonyms
 in 2012.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, million, kilograms with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "presented" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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