Experts say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with family and friends,whereas many now suffer from loneliness and health problems.what are the causes of this and what are some solutions.
There is no doubt that our
old
generation Fix the agreement mistake
older
had
led a more enjoyable and content life in the past.They had immense opportunities for exercise and spent quality time with their loved ones.Wrong verb form
has
However
,in the
contemporary society Correct article usage
apply
retires
face a variety of issues which include loneliness and ill Correct your spelling
retirees
health
.This
essay will explore the several causes and try to find some solutions to the said problem.
To begin
with,one of the prominent reasons for old age loneliness and compromised health
are
empty nestedness.Once the children Correct subject-verb agreement
is
starts
working,they Change the verb form
start
had
to leave the family and go away for their livelihood,which leaves the older parents alone.Wrong verb form
have
For example
,a recent study conducted by Munich university
,reveals the fact that 80% of the Capitalize word
University
elder
population Replace the word
elderly
confronts
with isolation.Wrong verb form
is confronted
Furthermore
,the less
avenues for socialising Change the quantifier
fewer
due to
ill health
is another typical cause for this
.Rather than spending time with friends,they opt to live inside the four walls due to
the fear of fall
.
The suggested solutions for Wrong verb form
falling
this
issue are old age home
with Fix the agreement mistake
homes
cutting edge
facilities and promoting old age clubs for improved social lives. In Japan, there are geriatric specialist Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
health
workers inspect the welfare of old people who live in the community. In Finland the oldies clubs are more prevelant
, where they Correct your spelling
prevalent
spent
quality time, engaged in various entertainments. The local governments in collaboration with Wrong verb form
spend
non governmental
organisations should adopt Add a hyphen
non-governmental
multifaceted
approach to tackle Add an article
a multifaceted
this
problem.
In conclusion, the
elderly people are undoubtedly facing Correct article usage
apply
aloneness
and bad Correct your spelling
loneliness
health
. The government as well as
general
public has an amble role to play Add an article
the general
to
Change preposition
in
give
adequate welfare for them.Verb problem
providing
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task achievement
To improve your Task Achievement score, ensure that your essay directly addresses all parts of the question. Your essay should provide a thorough analysis of the causes and a more detailed exploration of the solutions with specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical structure by ensuring a clear progression of ideas. Begin paragraphs with topic sentences that introduce the main idea, then provide supporting details. Use transition words to smoothly link ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
To improve on Coherence and Cohesion, focus on varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of linking words. This will make your writing more dynamic and easier to follow.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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