Some people consider sports to be their career. For others, it is mostly a workout to stay fit. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Movement
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The movement
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has an important place in society's lives for a healthy life. Some of them do
sports
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for their
career
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, some
Correct your spelling
do
it to stay in shape. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will discuss my thoughts on these two types of people.
Firstly
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, let's talk about seeing
sports
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as a
career
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path
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,
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besides
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apply
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for many nations. They dedicate years of training to master their
sports
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, aiming to compete at professional levels and achieve global recognition. Success in
this
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domain often translates into financial stability, brand endorsements, and
significiant
Correct your spelling
significant
influence on fans and upcoming athletes.
Also
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this
Linking Words
path
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Add a missing verb
is the
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the
Correct article usage
a
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lucrative
career
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. Anyone who wants can rise to professional levels.
On the other hand
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, a significant portion of the population views
sports
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as a means to maintain
pyhsical
Correct your spelling
physical
health and
wellnes
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wellness
. Engaging in
sports
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activities is considered a component of a balanced lifestyle, helping
individuals
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stay active , reduce stress, and foster social connections through recreational team
sports
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or
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individuals
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individual
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fitness pursuits.
Personally
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Personally,
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I prefer
like
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apply
show examples
this
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. Because
of
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apply
show examples
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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give me more energy and less stress. I
fell
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feel
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more happy. I guess more and more people
used
Add a missing verb
are used
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to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
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more like
this
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method. Because everyone' life is so
bussy
Correct your spelling
busy
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with other jobs
so
Correct word choice
apply
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individuals
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need to
some
Add a missing verb
do some
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relax
Change the form of the verb
relaxing
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activities like as a sport. Personally, I
beieve
Correct your spelling
believe
that
while
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sports
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offer an admirable
career
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path
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for talented and dedicated
individuals
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, for the
majorty
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majority
, it serves as an essential tool for maintaining
overall
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health and
wellbeing
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well-being
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. Encouraging
paticipation
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participation
in
sports
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at any level not only promotes physical fitness but
also
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aids in the
devepolment
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development
of teamwork and discipline among people.
Finally
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,
sports
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should find a place in
everone's
Correct your spelling
everyone's
life, even if it is done for
career
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path
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purposes or just to stay healthy. No matter what purpose it is done. I think it is quite important to stay alive.
Submitted by ecem.tekben on

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Introduction and Conclusion
To improve your score, make sure your essay includes a well-defined introduction and conclusion that encapsulate your main arguments effectively.
Task Achievement
For a higher task response score, expand your discussion by providing more detailed examples and analyses. This could include citing studies, giving statistics, or referencing specific athletes and their careers.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance coherence and cohesion by linking your ideas more smoothly. Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your sentences and paragraphs more effectively.
Language Use
Work on varying your sentence structures and vocabulary to add more complexity and interest to your writing. This will not only engage the reader more effectively but also showcase your language proficiency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • lucrative career path
  • master
  • professional levels
  • global recognition
  • financial stability
  • brand endorsements
  • physical health and wellness
  • balanced lifestyle
  • reduce stress
  • foster social connections
  • recreational team sports
  • fitness pursuits
  • maintaining overall health
  • participation
  • teamwork
  • discipline
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