Many schools are arranging unpaid work for teenagers to get some work experience in institutions or companies, because it is beneficial for students as well as institutions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is a trend that many institutions of higher education and
middles
schools build connections with various institutions and Change the noun form
middle
organizations
, appoaching
for opportunities for their Correct your spelling
approaching
students
to had
Wrong verb form
have
an
practicum before graduation. In my Change the article
a
prespectives
, I strongly agree that the action is beneficial for both the Correct your spelling
perspective
perspectives
students
as well as
the organizations
.
On one hand, teenagers can experience their desired jobs in reality beforehand and build up their relationship
with others during practicums. From learning the theory on paper, Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
students
never know how to practice in reality. For intances
, for Correct your spelling
instance
instances
the
Correct article usage
apply
future
teachers, never can they learn about the practical skills to manage the students
in future
classrooms without practice in real class scenarios. That is
why they need to be placed in an instituion
and try out their Correct your spelling
institution
future
positions at no cost. Additionally
, students
can also
judge whether they are suitable with
Change preposition
for
this
kind of job, whether
they have Correct word choice
and whether
passion
for living Correct article usage
a passion
with
Change preposition
in
this
position in the future
. This
practicum chances
is precious in the way that it Change the determiner
chance
enable
Change the verb form
enables
students
to have a trial before they sign contracts and paying
a year or even more time, and eventually Wrong verb form
pay
burning
out.
Wrong verb form
burn
On the other hand
, as for
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
organizations
, they
can choose more suitable prospective staff for their Correct pronoun usage
apply
future
development and run their business at a lower cost. The new generation in the working places
brings more innovative ideas for the Correct your spelling
workplace
future
society
, especially for companies which are seeking Change preposition
of society
for
more chances in Change preposition
apply
the
new markets. They can be the main power and support for Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
future
development. As for the companies during their hardship, the practicum students
are even the best choice since they are free labors
. Replace the word
labourers
That is
to say, they can have a
lower spending and still run the whole business.
In a nutshell, I believe the working experience during school time is precious and fruitful for both Remove the article
apply
students
and the institutions. Not only can adolescents explore their job choices in advance and build connections with others, but the organizations
can also
match with the
suitable, innovative new manpower Correct article usage
apply
in
a lower price.Change preposition
at
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coherence cohesion
Continue to develop a clear, logical structure in your essays. Your essay demonstrated a good sense of organization, but transitions between paragraphs could be smoother. Linking phrases such as 'In addition,' 'Furthermore,' or 'As a result' can help to connect ideas more seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the introduction and conclusion. A more distinct thesis statement in the introduction and a more comprehensive summary in the conclusion could strengthen your argument. This aids in immediately presenting your stance and summarizing your key points effectively at the end.
task achievement
Delve deeper into specific examples and evidence to support your arguments. Your essay made good points, but incorporating more detailed examples can add weight to your claims and make your arguments more persuasive.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite