-A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, with the increasing population, the use of
oil
is also
increasing. There are a limited number of oil
resources
on the planet where we live and well this
is decreasing over tim e
. A good few cost is wasted to access Correct your spelling
time
this
exhaustible energy
source. Some people think that it is more logical to spend money on energy
sources
that we can obtain from wind or sun like renewable energy
sources
, rather than spending money to find oil
, which is a finite one. In this
article, Iöwill
discuss whether I agree or disagree with Correct your spelling
I will
this
solution.
Firstly
, The finite nature of oil
reserves necessitates investment in renewable energy
sources
. I guess everyone agrees about it. Because of, obviously high expenditure on oil
exploration reflects short-term thinking that could compromise future energy
security. Instead
of investing in renewables like wind and solar can provide long-lasting solutions as well as
reduce environmental impact.Current investments in oil
search divert crucial funds from developing sustainable and clean energy
infrastructure.
Secondly
, The transition to renewable energy
is essential for economic sustainability and reducing dependency on oil
, which has fluctuating prices. And also
it is important that developing renewable energy
sources
can also
stimulate job creation in new industries, contributing to economic growth.
All these changes seem easy. However
, the reluctance to divert funds from oil
exploration to renewable energy
development stems from the existing infrastructure and vested interests in the oil
industry. As well as
it does not seem economically easy to give up these acquired rights and switch to a new system.
In my opinion, we can create new employment opportunities for many people by turning to natural resources
that are much easier to produce, without considering economic reasons and also
without consuming our limited energy
resources
. All of this
will be easier compared to the effort we put into finding oil
. In the end, I totally agree with the idea of spending some of this
money on natural resources
Submitted by ecem.tekben on
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task achievement
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction stating your position, body paragraphs with individual ideas supported by examples, and a conclusion summarizing your viewpoints. Your essay lacked a strong concluding statement directly addressing your stance on spending money on renewable resources.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your essay with clear, logical paragraphs. Each paragraph should begin with a topic sentence that signals the main idea, followed by supporting sentences with examples or explanations. Use linking words to connect ideas within and across paragraphs.
task achievement
Develop your points more thoroughly. While you've mentioned several key ideas (the finiteness of oil, the benefits of renewable energy, and the economic aspects of energy resources), these points need to be expanded with more specific details and examples to strengthen your argument.
general advice
Pay attention to spelling, punctuation, and grammatical accuracy to improve readability and professionalism. Specifically, watch for run-on sentences, correct usage of articles ('a', 'an', 'the'), and avoid using informal language or contractions in formal essays.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.