IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given graph depicts the average figure of British citizens used to travel everyday by car,bus or train from 1970 to 2030.

The given graph depicts the average figure of British citizens used to travel everyday by car,bus or train from 1970 to 2030.
The supplied line graph gives information on the car and 2 public transportation
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Great Britain starting from 1970 till some projections in 2030. The vehicles that are taken into account are cars, buses, and trains.
Overall
Linking Words
, Train and auto users have risen till today starting from 1970 and it is forecast that it is going to see upward trends for the future.
However
Linking Words
, bus passengers have seen slight deterioration, alongside
predicted
Correct article usage
a predicted
show examples
 decrease for the next years till 2030. Starting with the highest point is a car, it is clearly depicted that
this
Linking Words
 type of transportation was the most favourite
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and kept its prominence for a long period. Correspondingly, its indicator in the 1970s was around 5
million
Use synonyms
 people,
however
Linking Words
, it had slightly risen to 7
million
Use synonyms
 by 2010, following anticipation
a
Change preposition
of a
show examples
significant rise to 9
million
Use synonyms
 users by 2030.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the number of train commuters had
also
Linking Words
 seen a steady increase till 2010 going from 2 to 3
million
Use synonyms
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
following
projected
Correct article usage
a projected
show examples
 dramatic uplift from 3 to 5
million
Use synonyms
 passengers in 2030. Unlike, bus users will have seen a
meager
Change the spelling
meagre
show examples
 downturn till the 2030s, serving around 4
million
Use synonyms
 people in 1970, 3.5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2010 and less than 3
million
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2030.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: