Some people think that men and women have different qualities , therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extend do you agree or disagree
Many people hold the opinion that individuals who have different
gender
Fix the agreement mistake
genders
also
have different advantages
on skills, there fore
Correct your spelling
therefore
men
and women
are suitable to work in certain jobs
. This
is this
writer's ideal that strongly agree
with the following statement Change the verb form
agrees
due to
both physical
and Correct article usage
the physical
psycology
body of Correct your spelling
psychological
sexs
.
On the one hand, Correct your spelling
sex
men
are built more physically stronger than women
. From the stone age
, Correct your spelling
Stone Age
men
supposed
to go hunting and take all the risks Add a missing verb
were supposed
while
women
's responsibility is
to go fruit-picking. Wrong verb form
was
As
Correct word choice
Men
men
have short hair and being taller are evidences
for the fact that God have made the gender Change the wording
evidence
pieces of evidence
shreds of evidence
men
accounted
for high-risk, heavy duty and
Wrong verb form
account
women
with weaker ability of strength do not have to do that. As a result
, in recent years, the majority of police, firefighter, and strength demanding
Add a hyphen
strength-demanding
jobs
are done by males.
On the other hand
, women
have a more careful, sympathetic and patient mindset which makes them optimal for certain jobs
. With that advantage, women
can teach students, children
and raise them more effectively. On the Correct word choice
and children
opposite
, Correct word choice
other hand
men
with the personality of courage are suitable for dangerous jobs
, Moreover
, They have a high ego and always
willing to accomplish achievements to prove themselves self so that will be a motivation to take risks in their job. Concurrently, they are easy to get angry, Add a missing verb
are always
impatient
so is not ideal for childcare or Correct word choice
and impatient
such
jobs
.
Taking everything into account, the essay has proved that
why it is optimal for Correct word choice
apply
men
and women
to work certain categories of jobs
by disparities in their mindset and body strength.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Be cautious of generalizations that may oversimplify gender roles or capabilities, as this can make arguments appear less nuanced and persuasive.
Task Achievement
Consider introducing a wider range of examples and evidence to support your points, as this can make your argument more robust and comprehensive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on sentence structure and punctuation to improve readability and coherence. Consider breaking up long sentences into shorter, clearer ones.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use transitional phrases effectively to provide a clearer logical flow between ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the overall coherence of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Include a concise introduction that clearly outlines your essay's position and a strong conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your viewpoint to improve the structure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
