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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

number of arrests per year for using illegal drugs between 1991 to 2005

#arrests #year #drugs
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The graph shows
number
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a number
the number
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 of
arrests
 per year for using illegal drugs between 1991 to 2005. In 1991, the use of illegal drugs stood at 10.
Then
 for two following years, there was a gradual increase and the percentage of
arrests
 arrived at 25. After that,
this
 number peaked at 80 in 1995. For a couple of years, the
amount
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number
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 of
arrets
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arrests
leveled
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levelled
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 off and remained constant at 60. 1999 experienced a sharp decrease to 40, the rate reached a high of 70 in 2000. There was a sudden drop to 15 in 2001,
subsequently
, it witnessed a dramatic
rose
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rise
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 to 55 in 2002. For the three following years, there was a slight fluctuation
with
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in
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 the rate of
arrests
 ending the period at 40 per year.
Overall
,
this
 line graph represents the number of
arrests
 during the period
of
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from
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 1991 to 2005.
Submitted by hassanrasuli52 on

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task achievement
To improve task response, ensure your essay directly addresses the question asked. Incorporating a clear introduction, specifying your intention to discuss the trends, as well as a stronger conclusion summarizing the main points, could enhance your score.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, structure your essay more effectively by grouping similar trends together, and use linking words or phrases to smoothly transition between ideas. This will make your essay easier to follow and understand.
lexical resource
Introducing a wider range of vocabulary related to the topic can enrich your essay and make your points more compelling. Avoid redundancy by using synonyms or alternative expressions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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