Some people tink that men and women have different qualties, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
males
and females have different qualities,
hat
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
is why there are
jobs
suitable for each other. From my perspective, I disagree with
this
argument because of the equality. In the ancient era, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
sex discrimination. It
is means
Change the verb form
means
show examples
that
women
are the weaker sex, so they could not do
jobs
which are assumpted suitable for
men
.
However
, in
this
era,
women
can do all the
jobs
that
males
can do, even more effectively and beyond
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
men
. A good example of
this
is that in some families,
women
work in offices and
men
do the housework.
On the other hand
, many people believe that
men
and
women
should do
he
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
suitable work.
Due to
the assumption that females are weaker than
males
, they cannot do some heavy
jobs
such
as building o working outdoors and
males
will never do the chores. It is true that there are no differences between the two sexes in working effect because it depends on their abilities and professionalism.
To sum up
, separate
jobs
for
men
and
women
is a lack of equality, because it depends on the abilities and majors of each other to find
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
suitable
jobs
.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your introduction provides a clear stance and briefly outlines the arguments you will be discussing. This helps in setting the context and expectation for the reader.
Coherence & Cohesion
In the body paragraphs, clearly introduce your main points. To improve coherence, use topic sentences at the start of each paragraph. This improves the logical flow of your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Enhance cohesion by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Address the task more directly and comprehensively. Clearly express your viewpoint and consistently support it throughout the essay, ensuring that all parts of the task are addressed.
Task Achievement
Include a wider range of examples and evidence to support your arguments. Specific, relevant examples add depth to your essay and strengthen your argumentation.
Task Achievement
Work on developing clearer and more comprehensive ideas within your paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph supports your overall position in a direct and detailed manner.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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