Write about the following topic: The internet has changed the way we communicate. Much communication today happens through social media. Some people support this and think it is a positive development. Others believe that social media have negative effects. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Over more than two decades, the
internet
industry grew
significantly and brought Wrong verb form
has grown
a
plenty of benefits Remove the article
apply
in
our Change preposition
to
life
. Anyway, some people believe that Fix the agreement mistake
lives
this
progress has downside
effect as well. I would like to discuss both Correct article usage
a downside
point
of Change to a plural noun
points
views
in my essay.
Notably, Fix the agreement mistake
view
the
most of the Correct article usage
apply
internet
traffic being sent,
is related to the communication between people and systems. It gives Remove the comma
apply
the
flexibility in getting Correct article usage
apply
the
deals, saving a lot of time, and Correct article usage
apply
as a result
, making human's
productivity much Change noun form
human
effective
compared to the world without the web. As an example, we can consider the post office service. It took Correct quantifier usage
more effective
enormous
amount of time to deliver the mail to the address, Add an article
an enormous
whereas
, nowaday
it takes up to one minute Correct your spelling
nowadays
ar
even less. I definitely Correct your spelling
or
suppor
Correct your spelling
support
this
statement and use the power of this
technology every single day.
On the other hand
, it is hard not to agree with the claim that the internet
has Capitalize word
Internet
a drawbacks
. The networking service and media grow in an unregulated way, which is ok and it is Correct the article-noun agreement
drawbacks
a drawback
key
driver for the industry to develop Add an article
a key
the key
overall
. But, it leads to the
situation, where anyone can Correct article usage
a
spead
any type of content with Correct your spelling
spread
a harmful information
. Even worse, Remove the article
harmful information
a piece of harmful information
this
information may not be true. Consequently
, a lot of young people, children, consuming such
data, start to believe in what they have seen and mimic some actions which are the
Correct article usage
apply
potential danger
Replace the word
potentially dangerous
for
their Change preposition
to
life
and health.
In conclusion, I am not Fix the agreement mistake
lives
agains
the progress and plusses the Correct your spelling
against
internet
gives us and I do agree it is necessary
part of our day-to-day Correct article usage
a necessary
existance
. Correct your spelling
existence
Nevertheless
, we should not forget about filtering of
the things and threads the industry incorporates.Change preposition
apply
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Task Achievement
To improve your Task Achievement score, make sure to address all parts of the prompt more comprehensively. While you discuss both views and your own opinion, ensure that each view and your opinion are equally developed and clear.
Coherence and Cohesion
For your essay's coherence and cohesion, it's beneficial to explicitly use linking words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs. While you have a logical flow, making these connections more explicit will enhance readability and coherence.
Coherence and Cohesion
To further support your main points, incorporate a wider range of examples and evidence. Though you've included some examples, diversifying and elaborating on these will strengthen your essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example