Children recently play games when having free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

#children #games #time

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In the modern epoch, with the progress of technology, a

number

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of online

games

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were made.

Also

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, a

number

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of folks who have free

time

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prefer to play

games

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online rather than spend

time

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with their friends or family

although

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this

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phenomenon has demerits, some merits can not be overlooked. The following benefits and drawbacks and

also

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examples will help support my point of view. On the one hand, a

host

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of individuals especially youngsters prefer to play

games

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online.

Consequently

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this

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event has a large

number

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of cons

such

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as physical and mental illnesses.

For instance

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, in my country, Iran a

host

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of people who play online

games

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a lot may have some pain

such

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as eye or back pain. So, if you look at the screen and

seat

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sit

show examples

a lot, you will have pains when you get older.

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, if you do not spend

time

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with your family or friends when they will pass away or leave you, you be able to get a

host

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of mental illnesses

such

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as depression.

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, a people who live in the USA, when youngsters do not have any bond with their family when they are alone, they will do some bad things

such

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as they will do drugs or drunk.

On the other hand

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, a

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of people think that playing online

games

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has some benefits , especially for children.

For example

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, they can learn some languages not only learn all tongues, but

also

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they can speak English

due to

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the fact that when they play online they should communicate with each other.

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, in my opinion,

this

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reason is not extremely significant because we have a large

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of English institutes. So, we can go there and learn languages whatever want. In conclusion, we recognize

this

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event has a

host

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of obvious drawbacks and a

number

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of pros if we can control the

time

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when we play online

games

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Consequently

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, if parents can control their children, we won't have any cons. So, if I were they, I would change some things.

Submitted by bazarjanimohammadreza83 on Fri Feb 23 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve your score in Task Achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. Your response should clearly present relevant arguments for both sides (advantages and disadvantages) with a balanced view. Consider expanding on your ideas with more detailed explanations and direct answers to the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion

For better Coherence and Cohesion, work on organizing your essay more logically. Use paragraphs effectively to separate different ideas, and make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by examples or explanations. Transition words can help improve the flow of your writing, making your arguments easier to follow.

General

In terms of both Task Achievement and Coherence and Cohesion, providing more specific and varied examples will make your arguments stronger and more persuasive. Try to include real-world examples or hypothetical scenarios that directly relate to the advantages and disadvantages of children playing games in their free time.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

342 words

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Children recently play games when having free time. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

With a growing population, many people believe that we should focus on producing more GM food. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing this?