In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

There is no denying that fast
food
has become a major
food
source in many countries thanks to its wide
availabilty
Correct your spelling
availability
and low price. Despite possessing some positive aspects, I am apprehensive about
this
trend. Junk
food
is a foremost contributor to the high incidence of contracting diet-related illnesses in many nations. It must be acknowledged that fast
food
chains prioritize profit over the health of their customers by adding more salt and deeply frying products. When consumers excessively consume these fatty, rich-fat foods, suffering from obesity is inevitable as they contain high calories and are easy to get addicted to.
As a result
,
this
trend adversely affected social health outcomes, demanding financial resources from the government to treat the consequences of fast
food
consumption. Opponents of
this
fat-rich, processed
food
argue that the proliferation of fast-
food
franchises contributes to society's prosperity. Regarding society, these chains create job opportunities for
people
surrounding that area who are low-skilled workers needing no degree jobs. Take the Philippines, home of Jolibee, one of the world's most renowned fast-
food
brands. The quality of life of Philippine residents has improved since they started working at fast
food
restaurants, giving them an additional source of revenue. The ubiquity of processed
food
has revolutionized
people
's lifestyles. In many industrialized countries,
people
with hectic schedules have no concerns about preparing fresh
food
, which is time-consuming, but purchasing processed
food
is more delicious and time-efficient. In conclusion,
while
being a crucial factor in the development of society, having a detrimental impact on social health is the essential reason fast
food
can be integrated into
people
's diets.
Hence
, initiatives implemented by the government to educate
people
about the value of healthy diets are crucial to addressing
this
trend.

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task response
Ensure you fully address both sides of the argument evenly. While you have provided arguments for both the advantages and disadvantages of fast food, a more balanced exploration could enhance your task response score.
coherence & cohesion
For a stronger introduction, consider clearly stating your thesis or main argument. This will help clarify your stance on the topic right from the beginning.
coherence & cohesion
Work on developing your main points with clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This will help your reader understand the main idea you're discussing right away.
coherence & cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph flows naturally into the next. Use linking words and phrases to show the relationship between paragraphs and maintain a logical structure throughout your essay.
task response
Including a wider range of specific examples and evidence to support your points can enrich your essay. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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