Most schools offer some type of physical education prgram to their studetns. Why is it important. Should physical education clasess be required or optional

Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
of schools included physical
education
as a
part
of their curriculum. In
this
concurrent world, physical
education
is essential for
physical
Add an article
the physical
show examples
and mental well-being of
students
. I believe that physical
education
should be a compulsory
part
of educational programs as ample reasons are present to substantiate it.
This
essay will delve into the importance of
this
education
with relevant illustrations. First and foremost, physical
education
enables
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle for the
students
.
In other words
, nowadays juveniles are in the clutches of unhealthy food habits
such
as fast foods, chocolate and chips.
As a result
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
obesity and lifestyle diseases are prevalent among the young ones.By providing professional awareness about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
physical activities and diet, it can be reduced
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
a great
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
.
Moreover
, the space
constrain
Correct your spelling
constraints
show examples
in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cities
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
increased, in turn, play ground
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
utillized
Correct your spelling
utilized
utilised
for commercial and residential development. As a
Fix the agreement mistake
consequence
show examples
consequences
Add a comma
consequences,
show examples
juveniles do not have
play ground
Correct your spelling
playground
show examples
comapred
Correct your spelling
compared
to the bygone days.
Furthermore
, It is important to include physical activities as a
part
of
educational
Add an article
the educational
show examples
program as the early age is vital for developing good habits. In detail, school days are the perfect time to start a habit which can be
continue
Wrong verb form
continued
show examples
life long
Correct your spelling
lifelong
show examples
.
Therefore
, physical
education
should be considered as important as other subjects.
Besides
, teachers can identify and promote inborn talented sports
personals
Replace the word
personnel
show examples
. To illustrate, the famous
indian
Change the capitalization
Indian
show examples
cricketer Sachin
Tendulker
Correct your spelling
Tendulkar
innate talent is fortified by the physical
education
teacher in the school. Physical
education
is imperative for the mental well-being of
students
. Perfect mental and physical health is
require
Wrong verb form
required
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academic development. In conclusion, Physical
education
would enable
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
lifestyle for
students
. Since early age is considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
habit developing
Add a hyphen
habit-developing
show examples
stage, I believe that it should be an essential
part
of educational programs. Importance of physical
education
it is
importance
Replace the word
important
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
maintain
Change the verb form
maintaining
show examples
heatth
Correct your spelling
health
healthy
, more
studetns
Correct your spelling
students
are
obesity
Replace the word
obese
show examples
. no space at home. parents are busy. they can
acheive
Correct your spelling
achieve
life long. talented sports
students
can discover early life. mental
well- being
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
, away from stress,
Submitted by ck.manshad on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good overall structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. Try to make smoother transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Support your main points with more specific examples and details. You mention the importance of physical education in developing healthy habits and identifying talented individuals, but more concrete examples or statistical evidence would strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Avoid repetition by using a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures. Rephrasing your ideas differently can make your argument more compelling.
general
Pay attention to minor spelling and grammatical errors, as they can distract from your message. Proofreading your essay can help enhance its clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
Consider introducing opposing views or potential challenges to the importance of physical education. Addressing counterarguments can provide a more balanced perspective and demonstrate critical thinking skills.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: