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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

some people believe that proffessionals, such as doctors and engenieers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #proffessionals #doctors #engenieers #work #country
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Brain drain has become a ubiquitous presence in some communities, searching for a better standard of living .
While
 a number of opponents argue that they should be committed to their motherland, the proponents contend that having authority is a fundamental right of every single citizen by which we could claim that we are democratic. Looking at the opponents
first,
they argue that rearing these skillful and
knowledgable
Correct your spelling
knowledgeable
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 workforce has put a heavy burden on countries' budgets, allowing them to look forward to taking advantage of
this
 long-run investment. The more money spends on training these professionals, the more
taxpayer
Fix the agreement mistake
taxpayers
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 look to make profits from their both knowledge and experience.
Furthermore
, working in a region that you are familiar with its regulations gives you the opportunity to get a promotion and climb the ladder of success earlier than in a foreign country. on the other side, the proponents contend that these individuals have worked out to become a doctor or an engineer so they should be left to decide for not only their lives but
also
 their workplace. Not to be outdone, some of these graduates have paid tuition fees so as not to be captivated like
like
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apply
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a
debter
Correct your spelling
debater
.
Moreover
, imposing them for staying in a spot which is not their desire would let them down to work effectively. In some under-developed countries, people are struggling to earn decent salaries to make ends meet.
To conclude
,
although
 serving
to
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the home country is a precious sense of patriotism, the official should take steps to do fulfilment actions
such
 as increasing salary and devolving a good position to retain them.
Submitted by amirhossein7179 on

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coherence cohesion
Improve your essay's structure by clearly introducing your topic, presenting arguments for both sides, and concluding with your opinion. This will enhance the logical structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on linking your ideas more clearly between paragraphs. Using cohesive devices and transitional phrases can help improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Make sure to address the essay prompt fully by discussing both views and clearly stating your own. Include specific examples to support your arguments for a more complete response.
task achievement
Clarify and elaborate on your ideas more effectively. Ensure your points are comprehensive and supported with detailed examples or explanations.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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