IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie chart compares the amount of
tourists
Use synonyms
 who come from areas in the world
at
Change preposition
to
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 a holiday resort in Australia. The bar chart gives information about their holiday.
Overall
Linking Words
, European
tourists
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 account for the highest percentage of
tourists
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they spent the longest time in
this
Linking Words
 resort. Looking first at the pie chart, ranking first was Europe
tourists
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, with 37%.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by US
tourists
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, with 35%, which was twice as high as the figure for
tourists
Use synonyms
 who come from other areas, at 17%.
Bottom
Correct article usage
The bottom
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 of the list was Asian
tourists
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, with 10%. Regarding the table, turning to the average length of
day
Add an article
the day
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, European
tourists
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 spent
most
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the most
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 time at
this
Linking Words
 resort, with 16
days
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.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by American
tourists
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, with 14
days
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, which was twice as many as the figure for Asian
tourists
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, with 7
days
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. The
tourists
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 from the other regions have a vacation lasting 10
days
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. As for accommodation preferences, both
europe
Correct your spelling
European
tourists
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 and
tourists
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 from other regions chose camping and caravan.
On the contrary
Linking Words
,
Asians
Replace the word
Asian
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tourists
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 and American
tourists
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 decided to stay in
5 - star
Correct your spelling
5-star
 hotels and
4 - star
Correct your spelling
4-star
 hotels. In terms of main activity, sightseeing is the top choice for Asian and American
tourists
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 European
tourists
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 engaged in swimming or sunbathing,
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 from other regions chose to surf.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tourists, days with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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