Some people are happy to stay in the same area for their whole life, while others prefer living in many different places. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is true that some prefer to live in one place
through
Change preposition
throughout
show examples
their whole life which makes them happy ,
however
, other
people
like to try living in many different locations.
Although
people
by maintaining their position when settling down , have a static social life and they claim moving is so hard,
however
the majority and I believe that when moving to other
places
to live
people
can try different
experiences
and find many other
friends
. So I believe living in different
places
is worth it. On the one hand, many
people
believe moving to other
places
or countries gives
more
Correct pronoun usage
them more
show examples
experiences
to gain. Many of us prefer an interesting life with different pleasures to have , diverse entertainment and trying new actions. Meanwhile, relocating gives
people
the opportunity to face conditions that had not tried before.
For example
, when an Iranian moves to Canada
tries
Correct word choice
and tries
show examples
different foods, weather and culture ,so it is so having those new
experiences
is so satisfying.
In addition
to the reason mentioned above, many
people
love to expand their social lives and find more
friends
. Immigration or moving to another city will provide
people
a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
whole new community to explore and find suitable
friends
, and in the
mean
Correct your spelling
meantime
show examples
time
Add a comma
time,
show examples
people
can preserve their old
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
social media connections or
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
back.
For example
, when I moved to Tehran city from my home town, I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
found many
friends
in my working environment
while
I still
interact
Wrong verb form
interacted
show examples
with my old
friends
, so
this
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
more exciting to be in a larger community.
On the other hand
, some claim that moving is hard and might result in losing contact with
people
you are used to. Packing and getting adopted to a different situation can be hard,
However
, after a short amount of time
people
will be glad and might even like it more.
Besides
Add a comma
Besides,
show examples
there is always a way forward or backward.
Although
moving to a different area might
consequence
Verb problem
result
show examples
in seeing
friends
less face to face,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
due to
technology
this
notion will not result in
friends
drift
Wrong verb form
drifting
show examples
away, because
people
have access to their
friends
and family
any time
Correct your spelling
anytime
show examples
on social media. So, these issues can be dealt with
therefore
, I believe moving to another country or place is more beneficial.
To conclude
, Many
people
due to
have more
excitement
Replace the word
exciting
show examples
experiences
and finding more
friends
move to other
places
to live,
However
problems with
this
notion can be tackled easily.
Submitted by erfanamouie on

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structure
Ensure your introduction clearly introduces the topic and outlines your position. The conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your opinion firmly.
coherence
Maintain a clear logical flow in your essay by using transitional phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
cohesion
Develop your main points with specific examples. This not only supports your argument but also makes your essay more engaging and persuasive.
task response
Fully address all parts of the task in a balanced way, ensuring you discuss both views before providing your opinion. Make sure your opinion is clear and consistent throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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