Employees Who Are Engaged In Their Work Have Happier Home Life

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Psychology researchers at Kansas State University conducted investigations into the correlation between people’s positive

work

experiences and their family interaction. The survey revealed that engagement in

work

and mood in daily lives had mutual interaction. The investigation

also

unveiled the

facts

Fix the agreement mistake

fact

show examples

that

this

interaction varies from day to day and that the daily dedication to

work

held a positive effect on well-controlled workloads.

Conversely

, it was disclosed that negative forms of job involvement like workaholism and

work

addiction had a negative impact on their home life. Professor Culbertson concluded that whether employees showed positive

work

-to-family attitudes depended on the management abilities of the organisations.

Submitted by T Shiro on Sun Feb 25 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve task response, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task prompt. Although your essay discusses the correlation between work engagement and home life, it lacks a clear position or opinion on the topic, which is essential in many IELTS essay tasks. Consider adding a clear thesis statement at the end of your introduction and summarizing your viewpoint in the conclusion.

Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, make use of a wider range of linking phrases and topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This will help guide the reader through your argument or discussion more smoothly. Additionally, although you have presented some supported points, further elaboration and explanation of these points could strengthen your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

104 words

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Employees Who Are Engaged In Their Work Have Happier Home Life

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

At present the population of some countries include a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer with relevant example.

In some countries the average weight to people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve the problem?