In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
Currently, the topic of
older
or youthful is more vital is something which bears a number of Correct word choice
whether older
consideration
. The writer contends that elder Fix the agreement mistake
considerations
people
are more crucial than youth due to
their contribution with
Change preposition
to
country
and the ability to promulgate the customs Correct article usage
the country
while
others believe that younger are a driving force behind the attempt
of Fix the agreement mistake
attempts
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
age
.
There is compelling evidence that elder people
have more knowledge and experience due to
the fact they had
spent part of life to contribute to Wrong verb form
have
improvement
of Add an article
the improvement
provincial
and their Replace the word
province
family
. Fix the agreement mistake
families
This
can be understood that old age
is ancient, they invented, worked and attempted to develop progenitor’s
life. Correct article usage
the progenitor’s
For instance
, in war progeny joined the army to protect homey and family with patriotism, most
of them passed away and never Correct word choice
but most
can come
back to Wrong verb form
came
hometown
. Correct pronoun usage
their hometown
Hence
, old people
devoted
to society in certain situations.
Another point worth Add a missing verb
are devoted
consideration
is old Replace the word
considering
age
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
capacity
to promulgate Change the article
the capacity
the
customs and traditions. In Correct article usage
apply
order
words, old Correct your spelling
other
age
is erudite and provoke
laudatory, they know much about Correct subject-verb agreement
provokes
country’s
tradition that Correct article usage
the country’s
youth
cannot compare with. Correct article usage
the youth
As a result
, it was useful in protect
and Wrong verb form
protecting
preserve
the beauty of Wrong verb form
preserving
hometown
and nation. Correct article usage
the hometown
Therefore
, older people
may contain the valuation that eternity.
However
, there is a number of apparent that young people
are more vital owing to the fact that they are a motivation beyond the success of elderly
. They argue that in the culture Correct article usage
the elderly
think
old Verb problem
apply
age
is valued is
in light of the fact that Unnecessary verb
apply
of
Change preposition
apply
the
patriarchy makes progeny in Correct article usage
apply
family
need to imitate Add an article
the family
a family
progenitor like
prejudice. Add a hyphen
progenitor-like
This
is credible, on the contrary
in Asia culture, the young population ought to behave well with older people
such
as parents as they are the ones who gave birth to them, not due to
paterfamilias. Thus
, young people
cherish their relative
by their prodigious love.
In conclusion, it can be deduced that Fix the agreement mistake
relatives
gray
or youth is more valued is depended on certain Change the spelling
grey
culture
and thinking. On Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
this
basis, it is evident that older community
are always should be policed.Fix the agreement mistake
communities
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task achievement
To improve your score for task achievement, focus on directly answering the question posed in the prompt. Make sure to present a balanced discussion of both views before providing your opinion in a clear and distinct manner. Incorporate specific and relevant examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you should focus on organizing your essay in a more logical structure. Begin with an introduction that clearly states the topic and your viewpoint. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea with supporting sentences that relate directly to it. Also, work on improving transitions between paragraphs to achieve a smoother flow of ideas. Finally, your conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your opinion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example