In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important.Dicuss both views and give your opinion.
There is a confusing problem
that
between the olds Correct word choice
apply
andyoungs
who play a more vital role in society. Correct your spelling
and youngs
and young
This
author is comprehensive for youth due to
their health
and enthusiasm.
Firstly
, there is an undeniable point that young peoples
have enough Fix the agreement mistake
people
health
and time
to dedicate to society. In
Change preposition
At
the
young age, everyone will have a lot of Correct article usage
a
time
and opportunity
to work and study because they do not need to be responsible for taking care of Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
family
or having economic and social Correct pronoun usage
their family
burden
. Fix the agreement mistake
burdens
Thus
, young peoples
would be beneficial to the countries. Fix the agreement mistake
people
Moreover
, due to
the dense strength, the young can join in some community services such
as donating money, volunteering or caring disable
Change preposition
for disabled
childrens
. So, the role of young Correct your spelling
children
peoples
is Fix the agreement mistake
people
unreplaceable
in Correct your spelling
irreplaceable
the
society.
In terms of old age, they seem to be more wiser and better than the young owing to their Correct article usage
apply
life
Correct your spelling
lifetime
time
. The old could be the best teacher
for the young with their knowledge Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
in
professionals in which they help the young to develop their subjects and avoid some unpredictable mistakes in the future. What is Change preposition
of
mor
, the old Correct your spelling
more
are
really rich Change the verb form
is
of
social skills which their counterparts can learn from without any experiment of Change preposition
in
fallure
. Correct your spelling
failure
However
, because of their health
and busy life
, the old cannot work enthusiastically like young people. Not only the lack of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
health
but also
the over self-esteem can be a problem to the old that they are not flexible and effective in working when compared to the young. Hence
, the young is more important in culture with the superiority of health
and time
.
In conclusion, although
old age can be more professional and experienced in working but
they are inadequate in the Remove the conjunction
apply
health
,time
and enthusiasm which the young own characteristically.Submitted by [email protected] on
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structure
Work on developing a stronger, more coherent essay structure. Your essay would benefit from a clearer introduction that outlines the topics you will discuss, as well as more defined paragraphs that each focus on a separate idea.
detail
Ensure your main points are well-supported with specific examples or evidence. Your arguments will be more convincing and your essay more compelling if each point you make is clearly illustrated with examples or more in-depth explanation.
complexity
Avoid generalized statements and strive for more complexity in your analysis. Discussing the nuances of each viewpoint and acknowledging potential counterarguments can add depth to your essay.
accuracy
Pay attention to spelling and grammatical errors, as they can distract from your message. Consider using tools or additional proofreading to minimize these errors in your writing.
balance
Consider balancing your discussion more evenly between the two views before presenting your own. This approach will demonstrate your ability to engage with multiple perspectives, which is a key aspect of the task.
Your opinion
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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?