In some places old age is valued, while other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Whether which
generation
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should be
high- rated
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high-rated
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in some cultures
such
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as the
elder
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elderly
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or the young. The author contends that there should be
balance
Add an article
a balance
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between the new and the old that will not lead to some detrimental consequences
such
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as discrimination
while
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others argue that
one
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of two generations should be valued. The reason why many individuals believe that older people
is
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are
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paid more attention is that they affect directly
to
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apply
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the lifespan
rate
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of a
country
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.
In other words
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, people can assess a
country
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’s development through the
rate
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of how much the old populating in some specific fields
such
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as medication,
living
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and living
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conditions.
Consequently
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, the government focuses on the precious
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one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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instead
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of the youth, even though the
noticeable
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a noticeable
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discrepancy between
birth
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the birth
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rate
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and death
rate
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.
Whereas
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others argue that the young
generation
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should be the priority of a developing
country
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. As they may think the new
generation
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is the future of that culture,
thus
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, if they may have a good educational foundation and
well- being
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well-being
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development in both mental and physical health, they will contribute whatever they can to show their grateful attitude.
In contrast
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, if they
are
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apply
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lack
of
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apply
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those conditions, they will have a diverse impact on
nation’s
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the nation’s
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economy and society. The writer’s opinion is that both
of
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apply
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the
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apply
show examples
Use synonyms
generation
Change to a plural noun
generations
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should be balanced
instead
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of opting
which
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for which
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one
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is more valued. What the author means is focusing on
one
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generation
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too much can lead to the imbalance of a culture,
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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have to learn and gain experience from the old and utilize it for the future as
the
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apply
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innovation. Unless the community kept using the former method, that
country
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would be hardly developed.
Moreover
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, the priority heads to
one
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of the two
age
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ages
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can
also
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cause discrimination and conflict between them and even break the unity of a
country
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. Taking all points into account, despite the other people
advocate
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advocating
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that
one
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of the generations should be considered more vital,
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while
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apply
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the writer thinks that it should
be balance
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be balanced
show examples
as
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so as
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not
causing
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to cause
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some negative effects.

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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure logical progression in your arguments. Begin with a clear introductory paragraph that states both views and your stance. Each body paragraph should focus on one main idea with clear topic sentences. Transition words can help show the relationship between ideas more clearly.
Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, make your thesis statement clearer in the introduction. This helps the reader understand your stance from the beginning. Provide more specific examples to support each point; this will make your argument stronger and more persuasive. Remember to directly address the prompt by discussing both views thoroughly before presenting your own viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • repositories of knowledge
  • esteemed
  • insights
  • embedded
  • seeking advice
  • prioritizing
  • premium on innovation
  • dynamism
  • adaptability
  • technological advancements
  • entrepreneurs
  • pioneers
  • indispensable
  • stability
  • harmonious
  • progressive
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