Nowadays, older people who need employment have to compete with younger people. What problem does this cause and what are the solutions.

#people #employment

The older

people

need employment but more

compation

Correct your spelling

companion

competition

compassion

with young that because

the

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they

show examples

thinks that know about the

position

of the job more than the old

people

because

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do not

donot

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not

know about anything in

this

life

that is

from the young

people

thinks In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will discuss the

problem

and

solution

this

essay

Firstly

there are

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lots

alots

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a lot

Add an article

the problem

show examples

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

first is the old

people

must compete with young

people

for example

: the old

people

compation

Correct your spelling

competition

with young

people

about

the

Correct article usage

show examples

position

the

Correct article usage

show examples

private company the young

people

is coming manger and the older

people

is under that

Correct your spelling

problem

proplem

Correct your spelling

problem

because the

manger

Correct your spelling

manager

show examples

donot

Correct your spelling

do not

care about the old

people

so there will not polite with them

peolpe

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people

that is

problem

I hope in the future there will

have

Verb problem

show examples

solution

Change preposition

show examples

this

problem

muybe

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maybe

may be

the

people

will change Brian, There is a

solution

for

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show examples

this

problem

, the

youngman

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young man

should give the old

Correct your spelling

people

peolpe

Correct your spelling

people

area because

this

person is

Same

Correct article usage

the Same

show examples

Correct your spelling

their

thier

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their

parents age , it is important to polite and help them and

muybe

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maybe

there will win and

got

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

the

position

that is

fine ,they

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do not

donot

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do not

care about if the life because the employment

arenot

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are not

every time ,

threre

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there

will retire and miss the job but the reputation good and there will remember

thier

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their

friend and

that is

the life To sum

the

Change preposition

up the

show examples

main point is sometimes

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

people

are not polite with

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apply

show examples

old

people

, so it is bad so the

solution

is important to be polite , and the

position

isnnot

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is not

isn't

every time there will be

retir

Correct your spelling

retired

, in my

opinion

Add the comma(s)

opinion,

show examples

the young male will polite with old man

Submitted by nawafalruwaili363 on Mon Feb 26 2024

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Logical Structure

Focus on structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. In your introduction, directly address the topic and outline your main ideas. Each body paragraph should discuss one main idea, supported by examples or explanations. Finally, your conclusion should summarize your arguments and restate your position.

Introduction & Conclusion Presence

Make an effort to transition smoothly between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words (e.g., however, therefore, in addition) to help the reader follow your argument. This will also help you organize your thoughts more clearly.

Supported Main Points

Develop your points more fully with specific, detailed examples. Instead of general statements, illustrate your claims with concrete instances or hypothetical scenarios related to the employment challenges older people face.

Complete Response

Ensure your response directly addresses all parts of the task. It's important to discuss both the problems and the solutions related to older people competing with younger people for employment. Offer a balanced perspective by dedicating a similar amount of text to each.

Clear & Comprehensive Ideas

Strive for clarity in your ideas and expressions. Break down your arguments into clear, comprehensible points. Avoid overly complex sentences that may confuse the reader. Simplicity and clarity will greatly aid your reader's understanding.

Relevant & Specific Examples

Incorporate relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. These examples help illustrate your points and make your essay more convincing. They demonstrate your understanding of the topic and enrich your overall argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, older people who need employment have to compete with younger people. What problem does this cause and what are the solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that in order to give opportunities to new generations, companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire.Do you agree or disagree?

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The animal species are becoming extinct due to human activities on laand and in sea l.What are the reasons and solutions?

the advantages and disadvantages of technology in education

Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that chilren should go to school until they are older. Discuss both views and give your opinion.