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Band 5

Parents are the best teachers .do you agree or disagree

#parents #teachers
Father and Mother are the role models for their
children
. There is no doubt that their kids are being affected by their
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 all situations of
life
.so, I strongly agree with
this
 view, because
children
 will do what
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
 do exactly, think the way their
parents
 think and
parents
 are the window of their
children
 to the big world. It is worth considering that
Children
 mimic their
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
 behavior and attitudes. Sometimes they copycat them whether
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
this
 behavior is bad or good, acceptable or not.
For example
 when the father says a very bad word in front of his child
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
he should not be surprised when he hears that child say the same word in another situation. When
this
 kid becomes a
grown up
Add a hyphen
grown-up
show examples
,he will use the same words you always say.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 when your
tounge
Correct your spelling
tongue
 is always clean and says beautiful, complimentary talk , your
children
 will be the same . So try to make an effort and watch your language and improve your
attitudes
Fix the agreement mistake
attitude
show examples
. What is
more
Add a comma
more,
show examples
 is that
parents
 are the way
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their
children
 to see and adapt to the new big world.
Children
 build their information and concepts about people and everything in
life
 from their father and mother because
children
 trust
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
 a lot .
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 if you are always optimistic, thankful and hopeful in
life
 they will be that too.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 if you are pessimistic and
biliousness
Replace the word
bilious
show examples
,
children
 will be the same and will not succeed at anything in their
life
.
Last
 but not
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
least they see the world
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
 your eyes, so try to make it good for them. To draw the conclusion,
Children
 are the mirror of their
parents
. In my point of
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
 if
parents
 want to see their
children
something
Add a missing verb
do something
show examples
 amazing in the future ,they must start with themselves.
Submitted by Mido  on

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Task Achievement
To improve task response, ensure you fully address the prompt with a clear opinion stated in the introduction and consistently supported throughout. Expand your argument with a wider range of examples and evidence to show a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop a clear, logical structure for your essay, starting with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs each introducing a separate idea, and a well-defined conclusion. Use transition words effectively to guide the reader through your argument.
Task Achievement
Support each main point with specific, detailed examples. Avoid generalizations by providing concrete evidence or anecdotes to make your argument more compelling and impactful.
Coherence & Cohesion
For a more cohesive essay, ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. This can be achieved by using cohesive devices appropriately and checking that each paragraph deals with one clear idea, which links back to your main argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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