IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

On a recent holiday you lost a valuable item. Fortunately you have travel insurance to cover the cost of anything lost.

#holiday #item #travel #insurance #cost
Dear Sir or Madam, I hope you're doing well. I wanted to inform you that I lost my
brand new
Add a hyphen
brand-new
show examples
 phone during my recent trip to Hawaii. I've got travel insurance
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and the policy number. My phone had a good camera and lots of memory, and it was pretty fancy. I believe I might have lost it
while
 exploring the islands, maybe during the time I was taking pictures. I've read that the policy covers lost items during travel, so I'm hopeful that the insurance team can assist me in sorting
this
 out quickly. I'm reaching out to ask for your help, either to get some money back or maybe a new phone, as the policy seems to allow. I appreciate your prompt attention to
this
 matter. I'm hopeful we can find a solution soon. If you need more details, please let me know. Sincerely, JoXa
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve in the area of coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a stronger logical flow between ideas. This can be achieved by adding transitional phrases and ensuring that each sentence directly builds upon the last. Doing so will enhance the readability and structure of your letter.
Task Achievement
For task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the task. This includes providing a detailed description of the lost item, explaining the circumstances of the loss clearly, and specifying what action you desire from the reader (the insurance company). Adding more specific details about the item and the incident will further improve your letter.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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