In some place old age is valued , while in other cultures youth is considered important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
In the modern day, there are people who hold the opinion that the elder is prized
due to
their social experience while
the other
think that the youth is the main essential energy for the world. Fix the agreement mistake
others
This
writer agrees with the latter statement and will explain in the following essay.
There can be no doubt that mature individuals have more personal life
experiences which are necessary and useful for their life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Moreover
, they are also
knowledgeable about how to deal with bad situations and stressful conditions so the elderly can teach it to the next generation or dedicate their skill to society. Conversely
, their dedication may lend a hand to put up the way of life
. Take Toni Morrison as a good example , her innovation contributed a lot to the
social Correct article usage
apply
life
and it also
helped her to win the Nobel prizes
in the year of 1961.
Fix the agreement mistake
Prize
In contrast
, Youngsters are considered the
important age group in some cultures Correct article usage
an
due to
their energy. The youth is flexible with various situations and they can also
deal with problems in a positive way. As a result
, they can be considered in a lot of workplaces due to
their energetic ability. Furthermore
, young people are more active and physical
strong compared with the elderly so they can take part in the activities which need to use their health. Change the word
physically
For example
, the team named “Freshwater” gathered a group of teenagers is try
their best to make the rivers Wrong verb form
tried
in
there Correct word choice
apply
are
clean, which is Unnecessary verb
apply
the
Rephrase
why the
elder
Fix the agreement mistake
elders
do
not enough strong to take part in that activity.
It is the opinion of the writer that the youth have their own energy and passion, which help them to establish a higher standard of living for themselves and their families. Verb problem
are
Also
, the younger is a greater emphasis on innovation and progress. Young people nowadays are seen as the future of the world due to
their contribution to the
Correct article usage
apply
life
. I believe that they will contribute the most in all likelihood.
In conclusion, although
the elder have
more personal experience and wisdom which dedicate a lot to Change the verb form
has
the
society , youngsters will contribute Correct article usage
apply
the
world Change preposition
to the
due to
their knowledge about various technological revolutions.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines your position. This will help readers understand your stance from the beginning.
coherence and cohesion
Structure your essay in a more organized manner, separating each idea into its own paragraph. This will enhance the readability and coherence of your essay.
task response
Develop your points with more detailed examples. Specific examples strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Work on your grammar and punctuation to improve the overall clarity and professionalism of your essay.
task response
To better engage with the essay prompt, ensure a balanced discussion of both views before stating your opinion. This will fully address the task's requirements.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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