In some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some nations,
while
the
elder
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elderly
show examples
are treated as
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
aspect of society, the young generation is highly appreciated in the rest of the world.
This
essay will examine both viewpoints and
subsequently
advocate the latter
new
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
. On one hand, the possession of old agers’s experiences and knowledge has
up lifted
Correct your spelling
uplifted
show examples
their
positon
Correct your spelling
position
show examples
in the public.
This
is because
accumulation
Add an article
the accumulation
an accumulation
show examples
of different life-related skills in terms of resolving problems and implementing solutions has expanded their horizons.
Such
gained abilities as crucial for the orientation of
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation to the correct path.
For example
, in many multi-millionaire organizations, the director board is
guilded
Correct your spelling
guided
by a senior person, who is an expert in the field, where his experiences and
conpetenries
Correct your spelling
competencies
competences
are treated as paramount than
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
youth in that position.
Thus
, elders have owned a considerable level in society. In the country, in other nations, youths have been
give
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giving
given
show examples
a high priority. One main
reasons
Change to a singular noun
reason
show examples
for
this
tendency is the physical and
metal
Correct your spelling
mental
show examples
potentialities of youth play a pivotal role in the country’s workforce, where many senior individuals may often exhorted to recruit young
emplyees
Correct your spelling
employees
owning to their efficiency and productivity in the
work place
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workplace
show examples
resulting
them
Change preposition
in them
show examples
to be
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being
show examples
treated in high demand. Another important
facetor
Correct your spelling
factor
is the competence of dealing with state-of-the-art technological aspects. With computer literacy attributes for modern innovations, young entrepreneurs have expanded the
opportunies
Correct your spelling
opportunities
. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
some consider senior citizens
sighnificant
Correct your spelling
significant
based on their self experiences.
Other
Fix the agreement mistake
Others
show examples
advocate for young people
due to
their strength and updated skills. In my
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
it is more advantageous to incline

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Introduction and Conclusion
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Idea Development and Support
Develop your ideas fully in each paragraph. Your essay touched upon important points, but some ideas were not fully explained or supported with specific examples.
Paragraphing and Organization
Use paragraphing effectively to organize your essay. Each main idea should be discussed in its own paragraph with a clear topic sentence. This helps in making your argument more coherent.
Opinion Articulation
Include a clear opinion in your conclusion. Your conclusion should summarize the main points and clearly state your opinion. It seemed incomplete and did not fully articulate your stance.
Grammar and Accuracy
Proofread your essay for spelling and grammatical errors. These can distract from your argument and reduce the overall effectiveness of your communication.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • repositories of knowledge
  • esteemed
  • insights
  • embedded
  • seeking advice
  • prioritizing
  • premium on innovation
  • dynamism
  • adaptability
  • technological advancements
  • entrepreneurs
  • pioneers
  • indispensable
  • stability
  • harmonious
  • progressive
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