While a faction of people holds the notion that parents should closely monitor their offspring, others aruge that they should be independent from their parents. This essay will delve into both viewpoints and explain my support for the former opinion with relevant illustrations
While
a faction of people holds the notion that parents
should closely monitor their offspring, others aruge
that they should be independent from their Correct your spelling
argue
parents
. This
essay will delve into both viewpoints and explain my support for the former opinion with relevant illustrations.
First and foremost, the people who advocate for the independence of children
claim that allowing the freedom of choice at a young age would be beneficial for juveniles in their future. In other words
, without parental supervision
Add a comma
supervision,
juvenile
will learn from life experiences. Fix the agreement mistake
juveniles
For example
, if parents
allow a budget for monthly expenses for their offspring, children
will learn not only money management but also
the value of the money. Besides
, In the concurrent world, family members would not have sufficient time for
closely Change preposition
to
monitoring
young ones. Schools and authorities Wrong verb form
monitor
are
the responsibility to watch over the activities of adolescents.
Verb problem
have
Nevertheless
, parents
have a significant role in children
's development. In detail, at an early age, children
might not have the capacity to differentiate right and wrong, therefore
, parental guidance, undeniably, is vital for children
. Moreover
, since parents
have an immense influence on their children
, they can teach juveniles social responsibility and ethical practice
. Fix the agreement mistake
practices
For example
, there are several students participate
in the voluntary 2024 beech cleaning program in Dubai with their Wrong verb form
participating
parents
.
In conclusion, despite the children
independent development Change noun form
children's
is helps
in learning life experience, Change the verb form
helps
the
social responsibilities and ethical practices can be learned from the supervision of their Correct article usage
apply
parents
. I believe that children
should be supervised by their parents
.Submitted by ck.manshad on
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coherence cohesion
Enhance your essay's logical structure by ensuring a smoother transition between paragraphs. Utilizing transitional phrases can bridge ideas more seamlessly, contributing to a more cohesive argument.
coherence cohesion
In your introduction and conclusion, foreground your thesis more prominently. This can be done by stating your position unequivocally at the outset and reiterating it conclusively, thereby strengthening the impact of your argument.
coherence cohesion
To fortify the support for your main points, incorporate a broader range of examples and evidence. This diversification will not only validate your arguments further but also demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the subject matter.
task achievement
Your response adequately addresses the task, reflecting a balanced examination of both views and your own stance. For further improvement, aim for a nuanced presentation of your arguments, thoroughly exploring complexities and implications to provide a more compelling case.
task achievement
Clarify and expand upon your ideas to ensure they are comprehensive and easily understood. This may involve unfolding your reasoning with more depth, enabling readers to grasp the full scope of your perspective.
task achievement
While you use relevant examples, increasing their specificity and depth can significantly enhance your argument. Detailed scenarios or concrete evidence can provide stronger support, making your position more persuasive.