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Band 6

Some people think that the government should invest more money in teaching science than other subjects for the progress of the country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #science #subjects #progress #country
In the modern world,
science
 has a crucial role in many technological developments. It is undeniable that the government should give more budget in academics for enhancement of these subjects. I agree with the view
as
Change preposition
that
show examples
 the addition of more
science
 classes can improve the intellectual skills of
students
.
To begin
 with, there are various reasons for learning
science
 as
science
 is a structure for many innovations.
For example
, electric vehicles that created from knowledge of Physics and Chemicla subject. Nowadays,
science
 has affected to education system in the examination of
students
 and resulting in quality of
students
.
Moreover
,
science
 can benefit people from transport from traditional methods to digitalization methods.
For instance
, The way of working in the industry must change to an automated system.
In addition
, it can be seen that many innovations in the present day have emerged from
science
 and mathematics theories as GPS technology like Google Maps which generates short locations for driving or walking to users, using the theory of Euclid.
Furthermore
, economics or financial subjects use the knowledge of
science
 and math to solve problems. So the
students
 can apply
science
 to solve the problem of living.
Such
 as How to plan an investment plan. In many careers that use
science
 for work, The engineer solves the construction load and designs the structure of the building.
To conclude
, it is apparent that
science
 is an important subject for
students
 and many people. we should encourage children to study more than in the past.
Hence
, I believe every area should be invested equally.
Submitted by kungslowjam on

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structure
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content
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argument
Be specific in your argument. Clarify your stance early in the essay and make sure every paragraph contributes towards that viewpoint.
coherence
Use linking words effectively to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This will improve the flow and coherence of your essay.
grammar
Check for and correct any grammatical mistakes or typos, as these can distract from your argument and reduce clarity.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological innovations
  • economic growth
  • critical issues
  • balanced education
  • diversity
  • critical thinking
  • creativity
  • empathy
  • future market demands
  • societal needs
  • digital economy
  • innovation-driven world
  • overemphasis
  • devaluation
  • cultural understanding
  • social cohesion
  • competitive edge
  • renewable energy
  • career prospects
  • public good
  • evidence-based decisions
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