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Band 5.5

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country.

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country.
#line #results #survey #people #city #country
The line chart given provides the data on what made
people
 move to the main city of
a certain nations
Correct the article-noun agreement
certain nations
a certain nation
show examples
. On the whole, Moving for
enployment
Correct your spelling
employment
 and study is
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
 popular
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
than
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 two reasons throughout the
period
 from 2000 to 2015. Most notably, there is a significant increase in the
number
 of
people
 moving
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 study. Specifically, the
number
 of
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 began the
period
 in 2000
people
 from
approximatelly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 25000
people
, and rose to just under 90000
people
. Interestingly, the
number
 of
people
 moving for employment was the highest and increased by the year in 2010 from about 60000 to around 90000, but from
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
 time,
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 decreased to under 90000 by the end of the
period
 in 2015. Cleary, The reasons for family/friends and adventure had by far the low
number
 during
this
period
.Looking more closely, the
number
 of
people
 moving for family/friends
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 under 20000, and for adventure
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 under 3000.
Submitted by mayu1022.p on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Add some linking words.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, period, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocation
  • migration
  • employment opportunities
  • educational facilities
  • vibrant lifestyle
  • healthcare access
  • medical services
  • social connections
  • infrastructure
  • transport facilities
  • data trends
  • survey results
  • capital city
  • allure
  • motivating factor
  • influencing
  • attracting
  • analysis
  • evaluation
  • assessment
  • consideration
  • exploration
  • introduction
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